philo + kalia: hate what is evil; cling to what is good

January is Sanctity of Human Life Month

2012-01-13T20:44:00.000-06:00

dear humanity,

2011-12-25T13:45:00.001-06:00

Dear humanity,

I believe we´ve watched enough Disney movies by now to have learned that Christmas is not all about the gifts under the Christmas tree. I´d like to humbly suggest the following to the "Christmas is not all about..." list.

"Christmas is not all about..." LIST:
- gifts underneath the Christmas tree.
- how much you give.
- family.
- togetherness.
- happiness.

Because if Christmas were all about family and warm fuzzies, well, not much of a gift to all the dysfunctional families made of hearts too cold and numb for all that jazz. And if it´s about how much you give, what if you´re a good-for-nothing mess of a person too poor and needy and unstable to give jack? What if you´ve driven off all who love you? What if they´re dead or too busy? What if you´re not enough to keep a crowd? What if you´ve failed all those you could´ve loved? What if you´re Scrooge... but too broke and handicapped to reform?

Well, then, have Christmas, even if it´s not too merry.
Christmas is... Christ´s mass.
He ought to have one.

Because, just think:
God became physically cold, so our freezing souls could be clothed.
God became flesh, so He could be pierced for us.
He became a tiny body, so He could have it to give up for the life of the world.
He grew veins and blood, so He could spend it for bloodthirsty man.
God became man, so that
pathetic,
sin-eating,
self-sabotaging,
dirty,
disenchanted,
disillusioned,
disgusted and disgusting,
hoping,
feeling,
longing,
fearing,
humans
would never have to be alone again.

As ugly and lonely as we can be, we would never have to be alone again. God came to be with us, to be for us, to be one of us. And not "us" just as in universal humanity, but as in, "you" in particular. "me." the lonely, the loser, the loner down the street.

Family or no family, we would never have to be alone again.
Generous or stingy, we would never have to be alone again.
Healthy or dying, we would never have to be alone again.
With absolutely everything going for us,
or absolutely everything against us,
with laughlines creasing our eyes
or dark circles from dark nights of the soul,
with the reward of good choices surrounding us,
or the consequences of bad ones mocking us,
with children
or without,
with a bright future,
or a broken past,
we would never have to be alone again.

So, don´t just grit your teeth and wait for Merry Christmas to pass. Ignore Merry Christmas. Have a quiet, kind of sad one. But you could have a grateful, quiet, kind of sad one. You could rejoice, if not be happy. Maybe rejoicing just means getting out bed. Maybe just opening the curtains. Maybe just turning off the TV and praying a minute. But you can still rejoice. God is with us. That is God´s gift to us. In fact, that´s the only sort of "gift" we can really give back: to receive with meekness the engrafted Word, which is able to save our souls. You see, Christ´s Mass is all about receiving after all...

Rejoice, knowing all the facts... not just about our selves, but remembering the facts that include Him.

that's what i'm talking about.

2011-12-15T21:27:00.000-06:00

Advent, musically

2011-12-11T19:28:00.000-06:00

In a broken land the wells of love run dry
In a frozen place the hurts are left to cry
But if we live in shame
All that can grow is pain
Filling our hearts and minds
To hide You from our sight

Yet the calling voice is clear to one and all
To be on our guard and ready for the fall
So why do we stand tonight
Lost in the dead of night
Hearing the distant voices crying in the storm?

As the earth waits, as the earth waits
As the earth waits for your coming Lord
As the earth waits, as the earth waits
As the earth waits for your coming Lord

When I listen to the words of long ago
It is clear that we've forgotten all we've known
Let us set aside the night
And put on the arms of light
And wait for the dawn to come
For day will soon be here!

And the earth waits, and the earth waits

What to do now?

2011-12-04T17:16:00.000-06:00

"Now" being everything you read in a news magazine, hear on the radio, see promoted on youtube, witness your loved ones saying, doing, and turning into, worry about in the car, pray about in the morning, want to curse in the midday... all that makes cynicism look realistic. all that makes godlessness look like a beast devouring nearer and nearer to where you are...

What to do?

"Bind up the testimonies," Isaiah said to his community in a similar moment. Now is the time for prayer and fasting, for this kind of demon cannot be bidden to leave otherwise.

Now is the time for love and mercy in your family, your neighborhood and your church.

Now is the time to be winsome and childlike.

Now is the time for gentle speech, wisdom and trust.

Now is the time to say you have absolutely no idea how the future will pan out, and what exactly you and the church will be doing next year: "whereas you do not know about tomorrow -- what is your life?" (James 4.14).

Now is the time to protect the weak and to care for the broken earth.

Now is the time to care for the little things, and to eschew the great opportunities.

Now is the time to leave off theological speculation and ecclesial reorganization, and do the simple things of repentance and thanksgiving.

Now is the time to be poetic, and prophetic ...

... and to learn what peace is so you have some of it to give away.

- blessing of God upon Father Jonathan, here

Eden's Bridge - The One You Left Behind

2011-11-27T19:41:00.000-06:00

Part 2: On Virtue

2011-11-27T16:51:00.009-06:00

intro here.
recap: 1 Pet. 1 gives us a list of qualities that, if we practice them, we "will never fall".

My presuppositions: Not only do these qualities come from faith, they also strengthen it. They keep our faith from being ineffective, unfruitful, or generally good-for-nothing. They help us become farsighted and to remember we were cleansed from our former sins.
My questions: Why? How?

Quality One: Virtue

Definitions:
Virtue, according to Oxford, is "moral excellence; goodness." * Strong's lists this using as "arete" (a big deal for the Greeks) which is: 1) a virtuous course of thought, feeling and action; 1a) virtue, moral goodness; 2) any particular moral excellence, as modesty, purity.

When I think of virtue, I also think of Proverbs 31: early riser, hard worker, trustworthy, compassionate, wise, kind, generous. Someone who demonstrates good stuff on the inside and outside.

*Not really catechized, the best i can expound upon the historical virtues is to say go read Lewis, Mere Christianity, Book III. He lists them as being faith, hope, charity, prudence, temperence, justice, valor. (That's a translation from Spanish, the only version of the book I have.) I haven't read the book in a while, so I'm not going into depth on them.

Connection to faith:
"With the merciful, You will show Yourself merciful;
with the blameless man, You show Yourself blameless,
with the purified, You show Yourself pure;
and with the crooked, You make Yourself seem tortuous (twisted)"

To the pure, all things are pure, but to the defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure...
The pure in heart shall see God...

So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!

Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts... for My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways.

You thought I was altogether like you. But..."

***
When we sin, we obscure our vision of God. We were made like Him, but we've spent many, many decisions trying to mar the family resemblance. Making ourselves familiar with sin, we cannot now look at ourselves and assume God is like us. We choose to understand evil, to advocate for the devil, to sympathize with the flesh (an unreliable narrator if there ever was one)... instead of understanding God, communing (having in common) with Christ, and reasoning with His Spirit.

But we don't have to. When we are born again, we receive a "new" nature... a new natural, a second childhood, a new relationship with the Father we were always meant to adore. We have a second (first?) chance to be human, really, really human, in a good way, and as God-similar as the quinessential man Himself, Christ Jesus, showed us we could be. And the new relationship means that instead of obeying the first impulse that pulses through our brains, we learn from God how to be, how to do, how to grow into ourselves... We don't even know what all that will look like, except to know that when Christ appears, we'll be like Him.

So we seek to be like Christ. We become imitators, as dear children, of our newfound Father. But the crazy thing is, like Lewis said, people usually become what they pretend to be. Women are not born nurturers; but give us some kids, we pretend to be motherly, and end up BEING, thinking, sounding like our own mothers in all sorts of ironic, unexpected ways. Leaders might have leaderly tendencies, but a whole lot of confidence is just "faking" it, until all of sudden, one doesn't have to fake anymore. Everybody else really does need to do what we tell them to do, and we're going to make sure they do and convince them to want to. Our habits make us... identities don't just form habits; it works vice-versa as well.

What's it to do with faith?
When we seek to live virtuously- not just conventionally, but really to do, love, think, want what is good for us and for all, so help us God- we'll find our brain, our soul, our selves are changed. Deciding to love others will become so quick that we won't even notice the decision; we'll think it automatic, sort of like Someone else we know whose every work is done in kindness. [Let me insert: when we imitate God's goodness, we need to think a lot about motive. When has God ever done anything out of guilt? Responsibility, yes. Guilt? No. Fear? No. Obligation? No. Duty, responsibility are fine as long as we do something because it's a part of who we are. It's a function of identity, not image. God upholds His character but is not out to gain anyone's approval. He does good because He is good, He loves good, He wants to see good, He loves to have us see good, so on. There's a lot to it; I haven't thought it all through. Why does God do good?] As we do good, we'll be thinking, "Now, why am I doing this?" and we'll see the good effects and understand, "Oh. That's why God likes this." As we stand resist evil, we'll see it's ugliness and desperate power struggle. "Oh. No wonder God burns against this stuff. And I used to crave this?!"

When we do right actions from a right heart, we'll find we understand God a whole lot more. Instead of wanting to mistreat someone, and feeling God is going to get us for it, we'll love that person, and understand how we'd hate for that person to have to deal with crabbiness, like that of which we are capable. His thoughts won't be so alien to us as before. Instead of thinking, " 'Sell all you have and give alms?!' Ouch, how harsh, how radical," we'll think, "Man, look at all this stuff. Is there anything good I can get out of it before it all burns? I won't miss it..." By being like Him, we'll start thinking like Him. And people who think alike, duh, understand each other.

God our Father, without Whom nothing is strong, nothing is holy, will be more recognizable as we seek to become more recognizable as His children. We won't just say "Let God be true and every man a liar." We'll notice, more and more, "In the midst of liars, God is true!" We will become not just positionally on His side, but on His side by identity, by thought, by deed. Not having decided just once to trust Him to save us, we'll have trusted Him day after day to save us, to change us, to help us, to give us strength, to give us love, to shut up this whining old man, to grow into the new.

Faith will not be us leaping awkwardly in the dark because we feel it's what we're supposed to do, or even because it's our only hope (what faith is at the beginning). Our faith will be a relieved jump through the dark to the One we recognize in a world of strangers, someone we understand in a senseless world. True virtue helps us never fall because it trains us how to jump instead .

Untitled (Intro)

2011-11-22T15:19:00.001-06:00

thought one:
"Then there are some statistics that we get from places like Barna Group and Rainer Research—these are Christian organizations that study church involvement patterns. They say that by the time someone who is raised in the church reaches their 30th birthday, there‟s an 80 percent chance they will be disengaged from the church."
~ Drew Dyck, family life today

background:
i cite 16 as the age when the existence of God really started working some major changes in my mind and life. (that was wordy, but i don't really have a better way to put it.) almost immediately, almost funnily, i started to worry about other kids, like me, raised in the church but living in a world where dark and deceptive forces (influences, ideas, desires) wanted to blind them to the light of God.

but now there is a new horror in my neighborhood... not of kids not accepting the work of Christ, but of brethren rejecting it. and part of the horror is this: how do i know i won't do the same? i've met my loyalty, and i am not impressed.

thought two: factors

last summer, my brother, his family, and some inlaws were discussing Romans, and one person asked, "Well, why do people leave Christ?"

Indeed. Do they misplace their faith... "lose" it? Is faithlessness a disease? Does it just attack people? Is it some inherent weakness in their particular faith (gulp)? If we could figure this out, couldn't we find hope for some preventative medicine at least, if not an antidote?

Gary turned the question over to us. My elder nephew voiced his opinion:

"Lack of self-control."

This does not surprise me from said elder nephew. He's a pretty hardcore man-child. Just memorized "If" by Kipling, and very appropos the poem to his early-rising, systematic-reading, mountain-climbing self.

Though probably true, the comment sounded harsh to me, as i'm not quite so hardcore as he. Then, hardcore or not, i read II Peter 1, and i thought again.

It talks about supplementing faith with
~virtue
~knowledge
~self-control
~steadfastness
~godliness
~brotherly affection
~love

Wait, "self-control"? I thought of Benja and paid more attention. Now, i like lists, and i like to think about the lists in Scripture, but this stood out... and here's why.

8For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9For whoever lacks these qualities is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins. 10Therefore, brothers, be all the more diligent to make your calling and election sure, for if you practice these qualities you will never fall.

That part:
You.
Will.
Never.
Fall.

Whoa. That made me do a double, a triple, a multi-take.

thought three: but what about grace?
In recent times, i am very, very wary of legalism and strident about grace, so i had to think about that in relation to the text. Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?

It is God, God, God and His grace and Holy Spirit and love and the work of Christ that saves.

We just trust Him.

However, that trust in Him is not
inevitable,
indestructible,
or even as constant as grace.

It is a gift of God, but one that is to be guarded and developed, (not by the flesh, but by cooperation with the Spirit.) When we are faithless, (just like when we are loveless, joyless, unpeaceful, also things worked in us by Him) He remains faithful (because that is how He is). However, faithlessness can lead to despair and denial, in which we refuse God's grace, and He denies to override our wills. At that point, we're not just suspecting bad things about God, we choose "No God." Faithlessness is a very bad and dangerous place to be. You're standing over an abyss, held only by God's grace, and contemplating commanding Him to let you go.

So.
Our faith isn't everything, but it is the means of everything- to and from God. And if it is so important and yet non-inevitable, how to keep it, take care of it? How to cherish this gift Christ has given us?

Defining terms: Faith = trust in God to be God... to be good, loving, righteous, true, saving. And the above list of "good things" are supplements to that trust... (Hokily, I think of vitamins.) These qualities (virtue, knowledge, self-control, steadfastness, brotherly kindness, love) energize, strengthen, work with, and refine that God-worked faith to be something enduring and precious to God... that we will never fall.

This is part one.
Part two, forthcoming: On Virtue

News about our brother

2011-10-02T17:00:00.001-05:00

Dear Mr. Obama,
http://www.rutherford.org/pdf/9-29-11_NadarkhaniLetter.pdf

What Mr. Obama & co. had to say: (9/29/11)
"The United States condemns the conviction of Pastor Youcef Nadarkhani. Pastor Nadarkhani has done nothing more than maintain his devout faith, which is a universal right for all people.”

“That the Iranian authorities would try to force him to renounce that faith violates the religious values they claim to defend, crosses all bounds of decency, and breaches Iran’s own international obligations. A decision to impose the death penalty would further demonstrate the Iranian authorities’ utter disregard for religious freedom, and highlight Iran’s continuing violation of the universal rights of its citizens. We call upon the Iranian authorities to release Pastor Nadarkhani, and demonstrate a commitment to basic, universal human rights, including freedom of religion.”

What the supreme court (Iran) had to say: (Dec. 5, 2010)

[UNOFFICIAL TRANSLATION]

In the name of God
To the lawyers of the accused (defendant)
To the local court
To the state court of Gilan Section 11

December 5, 2010

Issued by section 27 Supreme Court Judge Morteza Fazel and Azizoallah Razaghi

Mr. Youcef Nadarkhani, son of Byrom, 32 years old, married, born in Rasht in the
state of Gilan is convicted of turning his back on Islam, the greatest religion the
prophesy of Mohammad at the age of 19.

He has often participated in Christian worship and organized home church
services, evangelizing and has been baptized and baptized others, converting
Muslims to Christianity. He has been accused of breaking Islamic Law that from
puberty (15 years according to Islamic law) until the age of 19 the year 1996, he
was raised a Muslim in a Muslim home. During court trials, he denied the
prophecy of Mohammad and the authority of Islam. He has stated that he is a
Christian and no longer Muslim.

During many sessions in court with the presence of his attorney and a judge, he has
been sentenced to execution by hanging according to article 8 of Tahrir –olvasileh.
His sentence was appealed by his attorney and sent to the supreme court.

The Supreme Courts Response
In the name of God

June 12, 2011

This sopena states;

We know that Mr. Nadarkhani has confessed that in his heart and in his actions he
has denied being Muslim and converted to Christianity and has advertised and
encouraged other Muslims to convert to Christianity. And because of advertising
and pastoring a church repeatedly professed his Christian faith and denied the
prophet Mohammad and the 12th Imam and denied the entire Koran and truth of
the Koran.

His case was forwarded to the supreme court (Judge Fazeli) and
According to Part 2 of article 265 of the Islamic Republic Criminal Law, this case
received by and must be returned the state court of Gilan Section 11, and further
investigated to prove that from puberty (15 years) to 19 he was not Muslim by his
acquaintances, relatives, local elders, and Muslims he frequented. He must repent
his Christian faith if this is the case. No research has been done to prove this, if it
can be proved that he was a practicing Muslim as an adult and has not repented, the
execution will be carried out.

Signed by Morteza Fazeli and Azizollah Razaghi

what Iran's saying now: (as of 10/ 01/11)
"His crime is not, as some claim, converting others to Christianity," Gholomali Rezvani, the Gilan province deputy governor, told Farsn news agency. "He is guilty of security-related crimes."

...namely "rape" and "extortion"

a family photo:

and a quote:

(courtesy his attorney)

“When asked to ‘repent’ by the judges, [Nadarkhani] stated:

‘Repent means to return. What should I return to? The blasphemy that I had before my faith in Christ?’

The judges replied: ‘To the religion of your ancestors—Islam.’

To which he replied: ‘I cannot.’”

...because people keep asking me about Obama and my country and stuff...

2011-07-10T00:46:00.001-05:00

...and i really have no clue.

so i decided to try and get one. links courtesy the ever-venerable dr. k.

thought one: nat'l debt, per bbc

...$14 trillion (£8.75tn) of debt has been amassed and there is no cogent plan to reduce it.

The figure is impossible to comprehend: easier to focus on the fact that it grows at $40,000 (£25,000) a second. Getting out of Afghanistan will help but actually only at the margins. The problem is much bigger than any one area of expenditure.
...Richard Haass of the Council on Foreign Relations acknowledges that this structural commitment to future debt is not unique to the United States. All advanced democracies have more or less the same problem, he says, "but in the case of the States the figures are absolutely enormous".

...He uses the analogy of Suez and the pressure that was put on the UK by the US to withdraw from that adventure. The pressure was not, of course, military. It was economic.

Britain needed US economic help. In the future, if China chooses to flex its muscles abroad, it may not be Chinese admirals who pose the real threat, Mr Haass tells us. "Chinese bankers could do the job."

Because of course Chinese bankers, if they withdrew their support for the US economy and their willingness to finance America's spending, could have an almost overnight impact on every American life, forcing interest rates to sky high levels and torpedoing the world's largest economy.

Not everyone accepts the debt-as-disaster thesis.

David Frum is a Republican intellectual and a former speech writer to President George W Bush.

He told me the problem, and the solution, were actually rather simple: "If I tell you you have a disease that will absolutely prostrate you and it could be prevented by taking a couple of aspirin and going for a walk, well I guess the situation isn't apocalyptic is it?

...Mr Frum believes that a future agreement to cut spending - he thinks America spends much too big a proportion of its GDP on health - and raise taxes, could very quickly bring the debt problem down to the level of quotidian normality.

...I am not so sure. What is the root cause of America's failure to get to grips with its debt? It can be argued that the problem is not really economic or even political; it is a cultural inability to face up to hard choices, even to acknowledge that the choices are there....

thought two: great article on china v. america and american decline

The Soviet Union collapsed because its economic system was highly inefficient, a fatal flaw that was disguised for a long time because the USSR never attempted to compete on world markets. China, by contrast, has proved its economic prowess on the global stage. Its economy has been growing at 9 to 10 percent a year, on average, for roughly three decades. It is now the world's leading exporter and its biggest manufacturer, and it is sitting on more than $2.5 trillion of foreign reserves. Chinese goods compete all over the world. This is no Soviet-style economic basket case.

...The famous projection by Goldman Sachs that China's economy will be bigger than that of the United States by 2027 was made before the 2008 economic crash. At the current pace, China could be No. 1 well before then.

China's economic prowess is already allowing Beijing to challenge American influence all over the world. The Chinese are the preferred partners of many African governments and the biggest trading partner of other emerging powers, such as Brazil and South Africa. China is also stepping in to buy the bonds of financially strapped members of the eurozone, such as Greece and Portugal.
And China is only the largest part of a bigger story about the rise of new economic and political players. America's traditional allies in Europe -- Britain, France, Italy, even Germany -- are slipping down the economic ranks. New powers are on the rise: India, Brazil, Turkey. They each have their own foreign-policy preferences, which collectively constrain America's ability to shape the world. Think of how India and Brazil sided with China at the global climate-change talks. Or the votes by Turkey and Brazil against America at the United Nations on sanctions against Iran. That is just a taste of things to come.

[China's challenges]
...Of course, it would be absurd to pretend that China does not face major challenges. In the short term, there is plenty of evidence that a property bubble is building in big cities like Shanghai, and inflation is on the rise. Over the long term, China has alarming political and economic transitions to navigate. The Communist Party is unlikely to be able to maintain its monopoly on political power forever. And the country's traditional dependence on exports and an undervalued currency are coming under increasing criticism from the United States and other international actors demanding a "rebalancing" of China's export-driven economy. The country also faces major demographic and environmental challenges: The population is aging rapidly as a result of the one-child policy, and China is threatened by water shortages and pollution.

...As things stand, America has the world's largest economy, the world's leading universities, and many of its biggest companies. The U.S. military is also incomparably more powerful than any rival. The United States spends almost as much on its military as the rest of the world put together. And let's also add in America's intangible assets. The country's combination of entrepreneurial flair and technological prowess has allowed it to lead the technological revolution. Talented immigrants still flock to U.S. shores. And now that Barack Obama is in the White House, the country's soft power has received a big boost. For all his troubles, polls show Obama is still the most charismatic leader in the world; Hu Jintao doesn't even come close. America also boasts the global allure of its creative industries (Hollywood and all that), its values, the increasing universality of the English language, and the attractiveness of the American Dream.

All true -- but all more vulnerable than you might think. American universities remain a formidable asset. But if the U.S. economy is not generating jobs, then those bright Asian graduate students who fill up the engineering and computer-science departments at Stanford University and MIT will return home in larger numbers. Fortune's latest ranking of the world's largest companies has only two American firms in the top 10 -- Walmart at No. 1 and ExxonMobil at No. 3. There are already three Chinese firms in the top 10: Sinopec, State Grid, and China National Petroleum. America's appeal might also diminish if the country is no longer so closely associated with opportunity, prosperity, and success. And though many foreigners are deeply attracted to the American Dream, there is also a deep well of anti-American sentiment in the world that al Qaeda and others have skillfully exploited, Obama or no Obama.

As for the U.S. military, the lesson of the Iraq and Afghan wars is that America's martial prowess is less useful than former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld and others imagined. U.S. troops, planes, and missiles can overthrow a government on the other side of the world in weeks, but pacifying and stabilizing a conquered country is another matter. Years after apparent victory, America is still bogged down by an apparently endless insurgency in Afghanistan.

Not only are Americans losing their appetite for foreign adventures, but the U.S. military budget is clearly going to come under pressure in this new age of austerity. The present paralysis in Washington offers little hope that the United States will deal with its budgetary problems swiftly or efficiently. The U.S. government's continuing reliance on foreign lending makes the country vulnerable, as Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's humbling 2009 request to the Chinese to keep buying U.S. Treasury bills revealed. America is funding its military supremacy through deficit spending, meaning the war in Afghanistan is effectively being paid for with a Chinese credit card. Little wonder that Adm. Mike Mullen, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, has identified the burgeoning national debt as the single largest threat to U.S. national security.

[Globalization not synonymous with Americanization?]
One reason why the United States was relaxed about China's rise in the years after the end of the Cold War was the deeply ingrained belief that globalization was spreading Western values. Some even thought that globalization and Americanization were virtually synonymous.

...There were two important misunderstandings buried in this theorizing. The first was that economic growth would inevitably -- and fairly swiftly -- lead to democratization. The second was that new democracies would inevitably be more friendly and helpful toward the United States. Neither assumption is working out.

In 1989, after the Tiananmen Square massacre, few Western analysts would have believed that 20 years later China would still be a one-party state -- and that its economy would also still be growing at phenomenal rates. The common (and comforting) Western assumption was that China would have to choose between political liberalization and economic failure. Surely a tightly controlled one-party state could not succeed in the era of cell phones and the World Wide Web?

...In fact, China managed to combine censorship and one-party rule with continuing economic success over the following decade. The confrontation between the Chinese government and Google in 2010 was instructive. Google, that icon of the digital era, threatened to withdraw from China in protest at censorship, but it eventually backed down in return for token concessions. It is now entirely conceivable that when China becomes the world's largest economy -- let us say in 2027 -- it will still be a one-party state run by the Communist Party.

And even if China does democratize, there is absolutely no guarantee that this will make life easier for the United States, let alone prolong America's global hegemony. The idea that democracies are liable to agree on the big global issues is now being undermined on a regular basis. India does not agree with the United States on climate change or the Doha round of trade talks. Brazil does not agree with the United States on how to handle Venezuela or Iran. A more democratic Turkey is today also a more Islamist Turkey, which is now refusing to take the American line on either Israel or Iran. In a similar vein, a more democratic China might also be a more prickly China, if the popularity of nationalist books and Internet sites in the Middle Kingdom is any guide.

[win-win or zero-sum?]
It is a central tenet of modern economics that trade is mutually beneficial for both partners, a win-win rather than a zero-sum. But that implies the rules of the game aren't rigged. Speaking before the 2010 World Economic Forum, Larry Summers, then Obama's chief economic advisor, remarked pointedly that the normal rules about the mutual benefits of trade do not necessarily apply when one trading partner is practicing mercantilist or protectionist policies. The U.S. government clearly thinks that China's undervaluation of its currency is a form of protectionism that has led to global economic imbalances and job losses in the United States. Leading economists, such as New York Times columnist Paul Krugman and the Peterson Institute's C. Fred Bergsten, have taken a similar line, arguing that tariffs or other retaliatory measures would be a legitimate response. So much for the win-win world.

...It is a central tenet of modern economics that trade is mutually beneficial for both partners, a win-win rather than a zero-sum. But that implies the rules of the game aren't rigged. Speaking before the 2010 World Economic Forum, Larry Summers, then Obama's chief economic advisor, remarked pointedly that the normal rules about the mutual benefits of trade do not necessarily apply when one trading partner is practicing mercantilist or protectionist policies. The U.S. government clearly thinks that China's undervaluation of its currency is a form of protectionism that has led to global economic imbalances and job losses in the United States. Leading economists, such as New York Times columnist Paul Krugman and the Peterson Institute's C. Fred Bergsten, have taken a similar line, arguing that tariffs or other retaliatory measures would be a legitimate response. So much for the win-win world.

...the United States has been acting as if the mutual interests created by globalization have repealed one of the oldest laws of international politics: the notion that rising players eventually clash with established powers.
In fact, rivalry between a rising China and a weakened America is now apparent across a whole range of issues, from territorial disputes in Asia to human rights. It is mercifully unlikely that the United States and China would ever actually go to war, but that is because both sides have nuclear weapons, not because globalization has magically dissolved their differences.

[conclusion:]
The United States still has formidable strengths. Its economy will eventually recover. Its military has a global presence and a technological edge that no other country can yet match. But America will never again experience the global dominance it enjoyed in the 17 years between the Soviet Union's collapse in 1991 and the financial crisis of 2008. Those days are over.

thought three: US as world's 3rd largest economy
The world is going to become richer and richer as developing economies play catch up over the coming years, according to Willem Buiter, chief economist at Citigroup.

"We expect strong growth in the world economy until 2050, with average real GDP growth rates of 4.6 percent per annum until 2030 and 3.8 percent per annum between 2030 and 2050," Buiter wrote in a market research.

...China should overtake the US to become the largest economy in the world by 2020, then be overtaken by India by 2050," he predicted.

...Growth will not be smooth, according to Buiter. "Expect booms and busts. Occasionally, there will be growth disasters, driven by poor policy, conflicts, or natural disasters. When it comes to that, don't believe that 'this time it's different'."

"Developing Asia and Africa will be the fastest growing regions, in our view, driven by population and income per capita growth, followed in terms of growth by the Middle East, Latin America, Central and Eastern Europe, the CIS, and finally the advanced nations of today," he wrote.

"For poor countries with large young populations, growing fast should be easy: open up, create some form of market economy, invest in human and physical capital, don't be unlucky and don't blow it. Catch-up and convergence should do the rest," Buiter added.

...six growth drivers that the Citigroup economists consider important:

A measure of domestic saving/ investment
A measure of demographic prospects
A measure of health
A measure of education
A measure of the quality of institutions and policies
A measure of trade openness

Using that index the nations to watch over the coming years are Bangladesh, China, Egypt, India, Indonesia, Iraq, Mongolia, Nigeria, the Philippines, Sri Lanka and Vietnam.

...

thought three: to be read

on Mr. Obama
on American corruption
on US Health Care Costs

on World rankings [ooooo so cool. check this one out for sure.]

Busy humans

2011-05-01T18:54:00.000-05:00

thought one: humans as apprentices
Humans, at our best, are like children. We imitate the Father. He planted and cares for His creation. Humans become farmers (or gardners, if otherwise occupied.) He paints the sky each day; the desert and mountains He sculpted. Michelangelo and hobbyists do their best. He gave minds, lends thoughts, sparks ideas, and fills them with facts; we gather small people around and tell how pinapples, the English language, and Texas came into being. God fixes, cleans up, constructs, and puts in order. Likewise, we reject chaos and messes in favor of making something worth existing. All work worth working has been done before, in some shape, by our God.

thought two: what is vocation?

The Lord is... kind in all His works.

So, i'd formulate...

God's work = creativity + love

When we can joyfully imitate God's work, God's business, for the service of others, we have found our vocation. What can we do- cheerfully, beautifully, well- for others?

Sometimes we get paid for it, which i really think is a nice bonus, but not totally relevent to the discussion. True vocation is about giving, not making a living. But it is a giving where we receive satisfaction from the very act of it.

It is probably not something done through gritted teeth, although living in a fallen world means our service might not always be pain-free. We have fleshes to reckon with- ours and others'- along with the world's black hole of lies and the devil's anti-joy, anti-beauty, anti-constructive schemes. Joy is inherent to it, but joy of a strong, resilient, fighting kind.

thought three: My vocation is ___________.

The question to ask is:

Doing what can i practically live Psalm 145?

Nature does it. The sky is the sky, the ocean does its thing, cats are cats, birds sing and fly like God really does exist, and it's the very best thing they could possibly do. If it weren't for sin, we could all be as happily human as a cat is happily feline. It's because of sin that we wish for (or end up being) less than we are to be. What cat wants to be less than a cat, say, to be a dog? None. They are not moral; they cannot choose to be less than what they were made to be. Only humans have the freedom to choose their shame.

Last thought...
God as Father is both title and work... and maybe the highest, best, most time-consuming work we can imitate...

Eden's Bridge - Journeys End

2011-04-28T22:12:00.000-05:00

i don't think i can really ask for more, except maybe to hope this is what my journey's end sounds like.

ألكتاب المقدس - إقرأ

2011-04-23T21:22:00.000-05:00

So, if you want to brush up on your Arabic, try listening to the Gospel of John here ---> ألكتاب المقدس - إقرأ

Then, try singing along to John 1:1-5 here --> http://reverdecer.com/Kalimat_Allah.html

Or, in Koine Greek here: http://reverdecer.com/Ologos.html

His accent might be atrocious, but i really couldn't tell...

how not to divorce your children or anyone else

2011-03-05T18:13:00.008-06:00

thought one:
i never understood divorce before. i mean, i understood the concept, yes, obviously, but i didn't understand how a person could find within themselves the desire to break apart from someone they're connected to.

then i became a teacher. i didn't understand divorce in year one or two, but now, in year three of making my living by teaching kids. maybe it has nothing to do with years and everything to do with a couple of children i've met, but i realized recently: i understand how people divorce.

it starts (for me) with will. in most of my relationships, i don't have all that great a stridency that my will be done. i think it's a personality thing, not a virtue. but as a teacher, it's my job to make other human beings do what i decide they need to do. sometimes for their own good, sometimes for the good of the class, but still, my will over theirs.

this year, i have a couple of kids with very strong wills. they're not monsters. i like them, actually. love them, really. they're great humans. i don't even dread seeing them each day. they bring me joy. they make me laugh. but. we fight.

not verbally. i'm an adult, and arguing with kids is not interesting to me. our wills fight. i will they work. they will they not. i can threaten x, y, z consequences. they can swallow the consequences and keep on willing other. i can call parents. they can reform. ...and then, again, will other when they forget that adrenaline rush of fear. i can take them to the principal. they can work. ...and then there's the following week.

the problem is our conflicting wills. somebody's gotta submit, and it's not me. [clearly, in a godly marriage, both wills would be submitting in various ways and at sundry times. but i'm not talking about godly marriages, rather identifying with broken ones.]

and the struggle is wearisome. one does not want to relate to another human being with a "win/lose" mentality, especially someone loved! one gets tired of all that unrelenting will when a remedy (the opposite's giving up of their will) is so easy. the frustration of so much selfishness...! why can't they just do the right thing? why can't they just do the hard thing? they won't die; they'll live as a better them!

yet, i get to go home, be silent (or be expressive, as need be), and drink in the tranquility of a home where God is king. there exists family, creation, books, distraction. struggle exists, but it is escapable.

people in breaking marriages have no home to go to. their family is their battle ground, not their refuge. they would be, i guess, in an inverted situation: their job would be their escape. nonhome would be their distraction. the outside would be where they'd seek "home."

so, all that to say, all of a sudden, i "understand" how one could hate that struggle, emotionally.

thought two: from a killer post on permissible/ impermissible rationale for divorce.

[example of impermissible:] Inability or unwillingness to become an adult. Many
people don't like marriage because only adults can tolerate marriage. Kids, as
likeable as they are, have a hard time overcoming their feelings. "Bigger kids"
-- older than 30 and much less likeable -- not only refuse to overcome their
feelings and passions: they turn them into a god...

The dirty secret of marriage counseling is that a lot of it just doesn't work. And the reason why it doesn't work is because marriage counseling is not “the one thing needful.”

What is needful is faith and works. The Way of the Cross and the Receiving of Grace. What is necessary is the practice of self-emptying, even starting with only one of the two partners. What is needed is for husband and wife to learn to control their own thoughts and emotions first through prayer and fasting. Their own lack of faith is played out treacherously and splayed out in the manifestations of these "impermissible rationales" – each of which bear a striking and spooky resemblance to logismoi (i.e., demonic insinuation).
I suggest that what marriages really need, in order to prevent divorce, is not marriage counseling, but rather exorcism – i.e., exorcism in the manner of catechism and spiritual works, of being trained to refute these horrid insinuations and to speak in the language of servanthood, charity and forgiveness.

The Lordship of Christ and Orthodox "psychic order" (i.e., kenotic self-sacrifice, and a mutual desire for sacramental peace and beauty) are what is needed. Marriage is oneness of flesh: it is a mysterious icon of Christ's union with the Church. Only an adult woman and an adult man can know each other well enough. Too many overstuffed and plasticized children with Playboy bodies and Mattel heads hook up in sex outside the shadow of the Cross, and wonder why they cannot survive the witching hour of soulish interrogation.
...The interrogation will come: and will you two know what to do? This is the supreme question for pre-marital counseling: it is the thematic question that not only defines the course of "marital therapy," but sadly explains why the couple is at loggerheads, and the icon of the Wedding at Cana has become so blurred.

Exorcism is the only antidote to divorce.
-father jonathan

thought three: "out of the mouth comes the issues of the heart"... and where do the issues of the heart come from?

It is sad, too, to hear the conversation of charge and counter-charge. It is rare that this dialogue ever ventures above adolescence, above the dull conventions of "He did this" and "She did this first." I think when I listen to these prurient ravings – these contretemps which are amplified into melodrama – I am actually hearing artifacts from movies and television. I think I am hearing not real and actual selves, but scripted ghosts of selves. It is as though the combatants were only faintly aware of feelings, and sought thus hither and thither in their short-term memory for some good line to articulate these feelings: but what is accessed and brought to the fore is simply that which is regarded the most, considered the most, and interiorized (even cathected) the most.

...It turns out, more often than not, that they were not brought up well at home: they should have grown up, over Sunday dinner, hearing and reading the noble stories, the beautiful myths that had the winsome virtue of psychic ordinance – the interiorization of the Sacred Order. They did not see the mother fill the room with light and grace, sustenance and healing, commanding love by the sheer presence of her quiet love and forgiveness. They did not see the father talk deep on memory and stand on ceremony. They did not see the father command himself before he ever thought to lead his wife and children.

(For that is what "headship" means: all command is predicated on self-command ... all external order is based on and structured by internal order. That is the simple, ridiculously simple, and sole reason why only an insufferable dolt insists that women and children "submit" to him: the very act of stating thus is itself an transgressive rejection of self-command.) [yes, i read this sentence.-Ed.]

These adult children saw instead a full embrace of sixties free expression, mod art and polyester, smorgasbord and shiny aluminum swanson Salisbury (a “Salisbury” by the way that had nothing to do with steak or England).

They saw the father belittled and the mother belabored.

They saw the cultural divinization of childishness at the expense of the domestic life-or-death nurturance of childhood.

And now I have husbands who do not know manhood enough to be husband or father … wives who do not know womanhood enough to be wife or mother.

Now I have adults in their forties, fifties and sixties who have watched TV so long that their psychological "models" are narcissists on TV and blowhards on the radio (never mind the dumpster-divers on the Net).

I have heartbreakers who are stuffed with the scripts of transgressive ego, but they are not filled with words or English: language, after all, communicates – but psychic "tapes" do not act as language at all. They are, simply, soliloquies. They are puerile challenges to the abyss, and the narcissistic echoes are taken – insipidly – as confirmations of their self-established myth.

...Adults are tough, mainly because they think they're adults. And what makes matters worse is the melancholic fact that more often than not, one of the two partners is guiltier than the other. One really has sinned more. I thought I would never see such a thing: but really, many marriages die because one of the two played the Prodigal Son (or daughter). And modern marriage counseling refuses to take this into account -- and thus it falls down.

So, in all this, as I am beating off the red-eyed wolf and the raving lion with my pastoral staff and smooth stones of enthymeme, I plead with my cold warriors to forgive as Jesus did. I paint an icon, psychically, of the extremity of the Cross, in the middle of the anger-spouting faces. And I try to plant, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do" in the middle of their lips. I know that that God has condemned (or rather, elected) them both to the eternal yoke of this marriage: and that this cold marital season, this very winter of their discontent, is meant for the chastening of their will, and for the redemption of soul and body. I know this, and I remind them of the fears and joys of forever.

...No. Instead of those money-making measures (and you can write a best-selling book about any self-soothing therapy), I have more in mind that just won't go away. I have this little thing called eternity, and for that, marriage requires not foam sticks, modern sex or fantasy. It requires fasting, for one thing. It requires quiet (turn off the matrix noise). It requires the Eucharist and the washing of feet, practiced every day in nuptial self-sacrifice. It requires giving up and surrendering in verbal arguments: even and especially husbands should say, simply, "You're right," pick up his socks and muddy boots, and let her have the last word.

I think that all verbal arguments should be ended with surrender. Let them win. For all your victories have been pyrrhic, no? [google "pyrrhic." it's a good word. -Ed.]

Marriage requires nepsis [ibid]. It requires grace and dogma. It calls for kenosis – a self-pouring-out like Christ did when He became like a slave on the Cross.

Marriage requires a tradition of beauty and peace – and for too, too many of our young couples, they have no domestic experience of this. In marriage counseling, we are really calling them to a place they've never been.

And that, friends, is why I don't like marriage counseling. It calls for kenosis. It demands the Cross. It is only understandable in forever. ...
-father jonathan, again.

last thought:
"The current generation of children, the one watching commitments between adults snap like dry twigs and observing parents who simply can't be bothered to marry each other and who hence drift in and out of their children's lives-- that's the generation who will be taking care of us when we are old."
-C. Flanagan, quoted in First Things

Pro-life, pro-woman song

2011-01-16T19:04:00.000-06:00

while you're at it, check out a conversation with gertrude.

with pathos, this time! (a letter to Rebekkah)

2010-12-22T20:01:00.011-06:00

Author's note to textual eavesdroppers: Rebekkah needed a letter written to her because compassion is a given, a hallmark, an essential in both her occupational and religious professions, and yet is only sporadically visible in her life. So, let us begin. You are welcome to come along, if you're one of those interesting individuals who likes to read people give it to themselves...

Dear Rebekkah,

Compassion, to feel/suffer with, is not just observing someone in pain or in a hard time. You know that. You might protest that to will feelings and to co-suffer is a bit hard and certainly not your spiritual gift or leadership strength, so let...er... us try to break this down for you. Baby steps, shall we?

Compassion starts with seeing the difference between where someone is and where that person "should" be. After "seeing" the discrepancy, compassion moves to indignation with the status quo. Compassion mature is a rebellion against inertia. It is recognizing that reality left alone is bad. Fully conceived, compassion is a decision to stop and alter the normal flow of events.

Compassion on the multitudes because they are like sheep without a shepherd, and they should be sheep with the Shepherd.
Compassion on the foodless, fasting multitude following Christ because they should lie down in green pastures and have the Lord break their fast.
Compassion from the king toward the debtor servant because a man and his family should not be sold for something so easily forgiveable as money...

Compassion starts with objective reality processed mentally, not necessarily affectively, you'll be relieved to hear. Emotions are kind of a byproduct of the observation/ analysis process. And actually, before the data-taking comes the vision of how reality "should" be. You're an idealist. You like that sort of thing.

Compassion for prostitutes on the streets because... they should be at home being faithful wives and loving mothers.
Compassion for exploited, vampy, hyper-sexual teenage girls because... they should be protected and pure, full of life and light and fullness of joy.
Compassion on those mocked because... we're all mockable, and we all should have a break - permission to be human.
Compassion on the friendless because... no one should be alone in such a weary world.
Compassion on the lost because... they should be Christian! Such things that make for their salvation...! They were invented-- this world was invented!-- for them to be Christian.
Compassion on the child who constantly misbehaves because... he should not be perpetually exposed to shame. He should know the happiness of being good.

Makes sense, yes? Now, let us discuss the friends and enemies of compassion.

the friends and enemies of compassion:

You cannot have compassion without ideals. It needs (as your Abolition of Man-y fact/opinion lesson plans put it) "value language." Shoulds and oughts, betters and bests, good and right are indispensible. The first thing to do is to learn to think "should" without qualifying your statement. To have compassion, you must also kill your insufferable fatalism [obviously, i've imitating my boy chesterton. that adjective could have easily been "bloody" or worse...] and believe that reality can be different than what is. Not only different, but better.

Consequently, cynics will consistantly NOT display compassion because they have grown accustomed to the bad, expect the worst, and find "better" improbable.

To show compassion requires not only ideals but also courage. Thusly, cowards will not show compassion because compassion involves risks, opposition, and possible disapproval.

Compassion worth showing needs good philosophy, true religion, and all the right "shoulds". Self-pitiers cannot be compassionate because they have a bad "should": If they have to suffer, so should others. The self-righteous skimp on compassion (and it's mother, gratitude) because good is calculated as a reward rather than a gift. The selfish lack compassion because they see goodness like a pie that if shared will leave them with less.

The ignorant cannot conceive of compassion because they do not understand the magnitude of the difference between the way things are and the way things should be.

The lazy will not display compassion because the law of inertia demands action by an outside force, and they have no force.

Yes, those lazy, ignorant, self-pitying, selfish, etc. uncompassionate them!
Alright! So we still have not resolved how to move you, Rebekkah, from bicentennial waves of compassion to a more consistant sort of Christ-likeness, although we have isolated some possible factors in the retardation of said process...

ahh. Christ-likeness. Being like Christ. Selah.

Does He have anything to do with it? Do we get to drag Jesus into the discussion? So glad you asked...

Let us forget you for a moment and remember why Christians traditionally cannot get over Him:

...because not only does He have compassion on the pitiable leper, the sad prostitute, the adulterous woman, the hungry multitude, but He has compassion on

the cynical,
the cowardly,
the self-pitying,
the self-righteous,
the selfish,
the lazy,
the uncompassionate!

in short...
on those of us humans who are
just
like
you!

(and, oh, Rebekkah. if we as Christians and you as an inhabitant of this earth do not adequately portray that, may both God and the world forgive us... because our sin is worse than we thought.)

Freely you have received; freely give.

So you try to be a disciple of Christ... pues, start taking notes.
Observe (worship), analyze (worship), imitate (worship) His compassions on us.

Because,
according to Him,

We should not be orphans, but sons of God. We should not perish but live forever. We should not be enemies of God, but friends. We should not be aliens but family. We should not be hopeless, but expectant. We should not be Godless, but full of Him. We should not be lost, but found. We should not be sitting in squalor waving filthy rags, but bowing, singing, feasting in robes of righteousness. We should not feed on slops, but eat at the table God Himself has laid for us.

We should not be profane, but sacred.

Not liars, but prophets.

Not guilty, but innocent.
Not abandoned, but adopted.
Not despairing, but of great cheer.
Not insane, but of a sound mind.
Not oppressed, but seated in the heavenlies with Christ.
Not strangers, but citizens.

...and certainly not cynical, cowered, self-pitying, self-righteous, selfish, lazy, hard-hearted ingrates.

...but hope-giving, triumphant, compassion-showing, God-thanking, self-forgetting, all-things-to-all-people imitators of Christ who make many rich.

You know, Christians. Not mere mortals, but little Christs.
Christ!

He is an idealist. He might have some suggestions for treating your compassion-deficiency disease...

Very sincerely yours,
Miss H.

thoughts after THE HIDING PLACE

2010-12-04T12:49:00.005-06:00

thought one: from comments on this article

“Imaginary evil is romantic and varied; real evil is gloomy, monotonous, barren,
boring. Imaginary good is boring; real good is always new, marvelous,
intoxicating. Therefore, ‘imaginative literature' is either boring or immoral
(or a mixture of both). It only escapes from this alternative if in some way it
passes over to the side of reality through the power of art - and only genius
can do that.”

~ simone weil, on literature and morality

[man, i wish i had that quote back my freshman year when my engl. prof was telling me about the innuendos in Rossetti's poems... makes me think of manalive, so very un-believable, but with much truth.]

thought two: the day after watching The Hiding Place, against my will.

i don't like suffering. like, really not one of my favorite themes, though i seek to be a Christian. it's one of those "difficult sayings" for me. i have a very superstitious dislike of writing or thinking much about these things. i was reluctant to watch the film because, well, i knew what it was about.

later, i was glad to have watched the movie. it is the most subversive thing. so true. very Christian. so opposite of the values of any other film we could have watched... the heroines were in their fifties. they were husbandless and happy. "you two talk all the time about love... i bet you've never even had a man!" they were not beautiful, especially in prison. their family really was righteous. their subversive activity came from devotion, not adrenaline. they were not cool, but they were unconcerned. good and evil were clear cut, but right and wrong (ethics) were not. it was not an easy film, but the movie was worth the tears.

it was very thought provoking, especially regarding theodicy, but i do not feel i have the right to opine on the issue. maybe after i've suffered...

thought three: on ugliness, modernity, and femininity in the movie

on these, i might opine a bit.

i was struck by the ugliness of the concentration camps. that seems so very superficial. but it was all rusted metal and squares and gray and brown and cold... and that was part of the problem. the inmates were constantly dehumanized, and the ugliness was as much a part of that process as anything.

the modernness of it all. the trains and boxcars and intercoms and roll call. the forties really weren't that long ago. the women... how liberated! to be able to be guards in a prison: that is equality! but the equality was to be as equally brutal as men, when my gender's... what to call it.... "sentimentality" is, i believe, a means of grace in a brutal world. it was disconcerting how unlike women both the guards and the prisoners were, even in skirts. they fought for clothes and bunks. they hurled racist slurs at one another. they pushed machinery and sorted metal. they whipped. they stole. they hated. they bribed. when "German whores" come to the camp, the women in the barracks yelled that there was no room for them. none were given the liberty to be women because to be woman is not a category on an identity card. it is to be human, particularly, personally, not as a subdivision of the animal kingdom.

to keep their sanity, or maybe just because prisoners must do something, some read the Bible. some prayed. but one also explained art techniques, and others discussed intricacies of a certain score of music. they argued over ingredients in a cake recipe. an otherwise hardened ex-midwife stole vitamins to care for the unborn baby of one prisoner. their acts of femininity were acts of humanity and the most rebellious thing they could do under the circumstances.

the unborn child of one of the prisoners was dangerous. if the administration had known, she would immediately have been sent to "experimental." (babies and mothers as fodder for experiments. this is modernity, folks. never would have been possible in those deep, dark middle ages.) for her to bring the baby to life would require an intervention from God and a hiding? a protection? from all the evil opposing the child's existence.

last thought:
children and are intolerable to satan becuase the birth and life of every child declares the existence of a good God. in a beautiful, selfish, ravaged world, children are the most beautiful and "otherworldly" thing we know. atheism seems plausible where there is no beauty and no children. thusly, satan would love the whole world to be ugly and adult. beauty and children are God's domain.

a praise chorus...

2010-11-25T10:20:00.003-06:00

...rather, 150 of them. (dang. that's a spoiler.)

thought one: then
when i was in high school, an era i have generally blotted out from my ruminations for my psychological well-being, my favorite song was entitled A Praise Chorus.

the name was misleading, although somewhatly appropriate. it was a praise chorus of sorts, but of a very self-aware, carpe diem type rather than the self-forgetting, carpe Deum kind.

basically:
"Things are never gonna be the way you want, where's it gonna get you acting serious?"
"Are you gonna live your life wonderin' standing in the back lookin' around?
Are you gonna waste your time thinkin' how you've grown up or how you missed out?"

good. true. better than metallica.
the best my angsty, self-absorbed little heart could groove to.
but so very elementary.

thought two: now

please allow a tribute... to a book of tributes.
the best our race (ie: human) has been capable of.
not something lost i unearthed, but messengers from God that have many a time unearthed me.

thought three: #57 on my thankful list: the book of Psalms
(in metaphorical fashion. feel free to join in.)

Blessed be God for His poetry.

...a life-saving device when up over your head in depression.
...the articulation you seek when your happy heart explodes within you.
...your defense plea when wrong.
...your prosecuting argument when oppressed.
...the stinging comback you were looking for the shut up your enemy's[ies'] fat mouth[s].
...best of all-time love songs to the Lover of your soul.
...thanksgiving hymns to the Inventor of light, children, and the five senses.
...rehab for the soul by the Healer who loved it back to life.
...the memories you want your children never to forget.
...the call of a grown-up child to his friends to "Come and see what I found!"
...our prayer book and hymnal, poetry, and soteriological history textbook, in lyrical form.
...our reply to creation's questions, declarations, and exclamations.
...our thank-you note for consciousness.
...our complaint filed against the Fall.
...our rebellious anthems against depravity.
...God's lack of panic at our dustiness.
...our instruction manual for burden-casting.
...why we don't need valium... or vodka.
...the best efforts of God's fan club.
...firm hands ahold of us when on the brink of insanity.
...Rembrandt for our apprenticed sketches...Mozart for our earnest whistles.
...soul food when nauseated by pop tripe.
...identity when struck with amnesia.
...good news from a far land.
...update on Zion when weary in Babylon.
...blunt poetry in a society of doublespeak.
...opera in the ghetto.
...your mom's meat and potatoes after too long spent at salad bars.
...emergency manual/ first-aid kit in the worst case scenario.
...family in a clan war.
...the exclamation point in a world of declarative sentencess.

...the best news i've heard all day.

finally,
O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt His name together...
for i sought the Lord and He heard me and delivered me from all my fears.
They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed.

O taste and see that the Lord is good!
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him.

hallelujah.

2010-11-21T22:05:00.000-06:00

webthings

2010-10-30T19:12:00.004-05:00

thought one:

(from a blog)
“Smells detonate softly in our memory like poignant land mines, hidden under the weedy moss of many years and experiences... Hit a tripwire of smell and memories explode all at once. A complex vision leaps out of the undergrowth.” Diane Ackerman

Most nostalgic smells for you are...?

thought two: from another blog

The English language has 26 letters in the alphabet, [but 42-44 phonemes, or distinct sounds; eg: th, sh, ch, t, d, s, etc.]

The frequency of use of each letter is as follows:
A 8.17%
B 1.49%
C 2.78%
D 4.25%
E 12.70%
F 2.23%
G 2.02%
H 6.09%
I 6.97%
J 0.15%
K 0.77%
L 4.03%
M 2.41%
N 6.75%
O 7.51%
P 1.93%
Q 0.10%
R 5.99%
S 6.33%
T 9.06%
U 2.76%
V 0.98%
W 2.36%
X 0.15%
Y 1.97%
Z 0.07%
[i have no idea if this is true or not, but i think it corresponds to scrabble...]

thought three: from merriam-webster or somesuch
American English words stolen from Spanish:
[some i had never heard in either.]
burrito
embargo
chimichanga
gazpacho
mariachi
sombrero
alligator
canasta
bonanza
chinchilla
machismo
enchilada
pueblo
hacienda
fandango
quesadilla
flotilla
tornado
flamenco
vigilante
adios
cabana
gordita
peccadillo
filibuster
tortilla
vanilla
cilantro
fiesta
anchovy
mesa
ramada
junco
cafeteria
bongo
castanets
mantilla
oregano
lariat
chalupa
buffalo
renegade
langosta
alamo
barrio
cedilla
Argentine
bolivar
amarillo
cordovan
desperado
empanada
tomatillo
diablo
pochismo
sierra
olio
bolero
junta
duenna

Paco de Lucía Concierto de Aranjuez Part2

2010-09-25T20:43:00.000-05:00

love! eros! words!

2010-09-06T11:50:00.005-05:00

***i generally try to stay away from addressing romance. "write what you know," i tend to believe. but a while back i was trying to think rationally and righteously on the whole issue, and since i think by writing, i have record of my contemplations... i thought now might be an appropriate time to share. as can be expected from the likes of me, it's pretty theoretical. i welcome experienced voices to respond.***

terms used below: definitions patched from hither and yon

hate to abuse words and all... please forgive if i do.

love: wanting good for another, even at cost to yourself
agape: same as above
eros: being "in love", pleased to pieces that another person exists, crazy about them, having your heart go pitter-patter when they're around, attraction, delight, desire for another to be yours
phileo: what one feels for a brother from a different mother, companionship, enjoyment of company, like-mindedness, affection, eros (appreciation of their existence) without the hormones and possessiveness

thought one: love

"But above all these things, put on love, which is the bond of perfection..."

Q: how is "love" distinct and more important than kindness, long suffering, tender mercies?
A: because those can have an impersonal element. we can be kind, tender, patient with strangers.

but love is when our well-being is tied up with another's well-being. their good is my good... their freedom, their abundance, their joy and happiness and peace satisfies me.

"you are in our hearts, to die together and to live together."
"And we live- if you remain steadfast"
"for what is our hope, or joy, or crown of rejoicing? Is it not even you in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ at His coming? For you are our glory and joy...'

and the more we truly love someone, the more we are willing to do, to give, to effort, to give up... that they may be full. our sacrifice is not as important to us as their good.

THAT is love.

our justification in being impatient and unkind not as strong as our decision and desire that they receive patience and kindness.

our temptation to vanity or to boast not as overwhelming as our desire to shield them from our pride. our tendency to puff up not as automatic as our attention to them. our habit of rudeness not as strong as our hunger to protect them from unkindness and pain. our instinct to seek our own not as possessing as our relief in seeing their good. [think: a mother] our automatic irritation not more necessary than our obligation to show them patience.

...our desires not realer than our purity... and our hunger for their own.

(we have Christ. we are not mere mortals.)

we want their good too much to accept their sin. it does not amuse or benefit us. we are too happy in their light to infect them with darkness. we put up with them, because who they are is worth bearing a bit of their... junk. we believe in them, because we see their soul, and it is beautiful. we hope for them, because we are full if they are. we endure for them, because they vale la pena.

we cannot, will not, do not stop... regardless of anything... because, ontologically, this love is not the stopping kind.

thought three: eros!

philo/eros, per my definition, is delight/ pleasure IN them. just them (forgive my pronoun abuse) gives us satisfaction. beautiful! wonderful! exhilarating!

not bad, this eros! a gift from God! one of His really, really, really good ideas!

but...

not the same as agape.

which they (phileo/ eros, here grouped) don't have to be. they are something else. gifts.

but agape is not a gift; it is an obligation. a part of the package deal of being filled with the life of God. or better put, agape is a gift. but not one that can end with you. the privilege of God's love entails certain responsibilities.

and here is the hard part, the bitter pill, the grit-your-teeth-and-do-the-miserable-right-thing aspect to eros...

it can be opposite of love.

if my delight in being with a person ends up causing them harm or sadness instead of good, i am operating in eros to the exclusion of agape.

"What?!" I tell myself. "Don't be so fanatical. So conservative. So Elisabeth Elliot-y. This is harmless. Nice. Lovely. Sweet. Enjoyable." But is it a sustainable joy? Is it a bliss you can back up with committment? Are the emotions you're evoking (in another!) promises you can keep? Are the feelings you're producing (in another!) free to bear fruit?

because we don't live in an eternal now. we live with the future chasing us daily. we can sing loudly and try to pretend that the future is not as real as now, but the future will catch up, in all its glorious, hideous reality. we have to learn to see the end from the beginning, or we will be habitually filled with regret, in a few months, a few years, on our death bed... let alone on the day of judgment.

when my pleasure in someone- my happiness in being with them- is also a gift to them (good and perfect, from above, without darkness or shadow of turning), then eros has meshed with agape and what God has joined let no man put asunder. this shall be stronger than death.

but, if my enjoyment of them leads to unredemptive pain for them, how is that loving them? if i take pleasure in what will bring them harm, is that not malice?

maybe we can limit ourselves to phileo. let us all take a big sigh of relief and enjoy the gift. yea for brotherly love. but if i barely know my own heart, how can i guess at another's? is platonic love sustainable? hard to know contingency, action/reaction, cause and effect before it happens, me lacking omniscience and all. which means God has to be around here somewhere, or i crash and burn, taking another down with me.

Lord God. Thank You for every good and perfect gift, but restrain this flesh of mine from messing it all up. You be with and love the company of the one who can only benefit from more of You. You bring no sadness. Let me be like You.

thought three: ugh. (honestly)
but how exhausting is agape! how much attention! and will! and energy doth it require! and... misery that seems inherent to it! how terribly impossible to live like that...

...unless God really is true and we are no more mere men, but humans living by the life of God.

if the very existence and continued salvation of our soul requires miracles from the hand of God, (and by "miracle", i mean God changing what would happen by natural cause/effect and chance) then loving others is not beyond reason. and if our mere existence, prolonged throughout eternity, has costed God so much, wouldn't it make sense that others should cost us a little, too?

children, i think, are "easier" to love. they require more, but it is more "natural" to love them because of our perspective of them. we see easier how needy they are. maybe not always easy to do whatever self-sacrificing thing they need us to do, but easier to know and feel it should be done. well, easier than loving grown ups, anyways. still talking shades of impossible...

lastly...
God is love. The love of God was present in His creation of every single human being. He never created a soul without love for it present. In fact, as i once heard it put, "He created us to love us."

Pray with confidence...
and be very careful how you treat His humans.

que ninguno agravie ni engañe en nada a su hermano; porque el Señor es vengador de todo esto, como ya os hemos dicho y testificado.

The Problem With Me and Moses

2010-08-08T02:07:00.002-05:00

How to deal when we see evil in people? ...when our brothers fail us, when our babies act like the devil, when humans deny their humanity by resembling demons... What shall we do?

thought one:

Anger is an emotion... a near automatic response to given stimuli. After emotions come decisions. Decisions lead to actions. It's the last two that we're most responsible for.

The way i see it, we have 3 options when faced with our anger- whether it be provoked by our darlings or by Darfur:

apathy,

bitterness, or

hope.

I think the Christian obligation is obvious.

thought two: of Moses and i

Remember Moses? It´s not my job or my role to be angry. I am here to advocate for them, not to judge them. They have a judge; I´m not needed. It´s not right for me to have an opinion, only compassion. Do i recognize evil? Obviously. Do i have permission to park there? Never.

Regarding the ones we love:

Unconditional love does not dry up in disgust when it sees wickedness in the object of its affections... it prays harder. Because its #1 objective is to have that person be and receive what is good... and wickedness is the opposite of that. U.L. will not leave the loved alone in iniquity to protect its own aesthetic sensibilities... it will jump in and fight the evil that would destroy the beloved. And how do wee mortals like us fight something like evil?

"God! Maker of the universe! Jump in!"

thought three:

Praying without ceasing need not be a hyperbole. We start prayers all the time: every time we see and think about and especially emote over an evil or something not right... we just forget to finish our prayers. The problem with complaining is not that it's wrong to recognize something's messed up... it that we stop with the obvious.

"EVIL! EVIL! EVIL!"

"STUPIDITY! INJUSTICE! IGNORANCE!"

"IDIOTS!"

"CRUELTY! HATEFULNESS! BONDAGE!"

ok. now finish your sentence. this time, remembering that God exists.

"Stop evil, O God!"

"Teach these idiots!"

"Bring justice!"

"Educate the ignorant!"

"Convince the cruel to repent!"

"Change the heart of the hateful!"

"Free these enslaved!"

Don't forget: all a sentence needs is a subject and a predicate to be communicating. ("You" is the implied subject...) Remember your verbs.

"Help!"

"Save!"

"Free!"

"Convict!"

"Have mercy!"

"Forgive!"

"Grant me patience!"

(direct objects and prepositions only provide details to the essential, and God knows who we're talking about.)

finally...

if our Lord didn't even come to condemn [leave people to wallow in their sin and its consequences] but to save, how do we think we are different?

Our job is not merely to identify sin, wrong doing, and idiocy. Our job is to fight it. We cannot be content to leave people to themselves. We must seek Jesus for them, just like we need Jesus for ourselves and our own homemade evil.

Being a Christian involves caring. Here, i don't mean "being kind"... i mean, "giving importance." It's in our job description to hope. Even the most dire of the Prophets always offered a possible way out... and prayed and wept for it as well.

Our last word to this sin-sick world cannot be a sarcastic one. Our last thought cannot be a disgusted one. Christ is too efficacious for us to be cynical. Just as we want the bad to turn to good, the sin to turn to righteousness, so also we must be turned from anger to intercession. It is our calling.

Even as Christ forgave you, so also you must do...
Freely you have received, freely then give...
Prayers and supplications... for all men...

Así que, lejos de mí pecar contra Jehová dejando de rogar por vosotros...

Ode to Peru (or, The Heaviness of Not Being Single)

2010-08-07T22:23:00.005-05:00

[note: i intended to write this on 21 July 2010, the 7th birthday of my predilection for walking Peruvian soil. however, internet was inaccessible, and i only had 2 days left on the southern America. below are thoughts from that day and a few others from the recent past.]

thought one:

i used to be single.

Like a candy bar on a shelf, or a slice of cheese. Like one of those quiet, economy hotel rooms.

Those days are gone.

No more an island, i am now... not even a whole anything anymore.

I am a part. A fraction. A piece of the continent.

[Now, i am often irked to read essays where writers take a perfectly good, commonly accepted word, and slaughter it, but that is exactly what i aim to do.]

the word is "single." and here it dies:

"Single" is a sad word, but at least it implies a whole. A "whole" lacking another, pobrecito, to become a "double" or a "pair," but at least one.

I am far less than one.

I am 1/3. Me, Reyna, and Marisol. So when i miss them, i don't miss them as one of the three Magi on vacation; i miss them like my body would miss my two arms. So when i'm here and my wit lacks, that makes sense. That was Reyna's job, to be witty and quick and all. And when i am a crummy friend and don't return phone calls and forget to email, just remember, Marisol's not here to bring loyalty to my mind. I'm just 1/3.

And, so i am not quite one. i am not single.

i am much too attached to be single.

i am 1/19 in my classroom. a fraction, but huge! like a whole century is 1/10 when compared to a millinium. so many kids, so much talking, laughing, questions, reprimands, so many humans. where is my solitude there? ...and, by another reckoning, where would i be without the other 18/19? i would not be... myself. i would not have that identity of "teacher" without others to teach.

of my family, i don't know how to denominate my fraction. you mean, in east texas? well, then i'm 1/3. in the americas? 1/40 or so, i think was the last count.

of the family of God? good night! who can reckon that?! i guess i'd be like 1/ 60 of our congregation. a fraction of a fraction. and then we'd have to count up the ones who have gone before...

so small am i. almost infinitely small.

but a single? never. there is always a larger whole to be part of... to belong to.

and, if i understand my theology correctly, my connectedness extends to the Godhead. am i a "part of God"? sounds blasphemous to me. He's God whether i exist or not. but i could never be me without Him. and i'm not talking about virtue or anything like that. i mean, what would i think about, subtracting Him from the equation? what would i love, were He to remove Himself from my world? can i find anything without a trace of Him?

what is mean is not to glory in some connected, networked life. it's that we're all connected. Paul might have mentioned that. we're not everything, but we're something... and a part of something more. and the very place where we are at our most unimpressive, insignficant, unastounding- in the Presence of the living God- where we really are nothing... is where we are most honored. we are dignified by the fact..."but i am not alone." we have God to belong to, as if we were something.

it's... nice.

thought two: what Perú has taught me

1) See thought one.

2) Your family is your treasure, your posse, your network, your lawyer, your retirement, your friends, your home.

3) Love your mother.

4) Wash the dishes. Just shut up and wash the dishes. Sing if you want to, but get it done.

5) There´s always room for a second dinner. ("I already ate," is a sorry excuse not to break bread with brethren.)

6) When coming down (or up) a mountain in the dark with not much moon, "step on the whites." (Pisa los blancos) If where you´re stepping is dark, it´s not a step.

7) Pack for emergencies. Even if it´s heavy, people will thank you later. Bring Germ-x, food, an extra coat. And Louisiana.

8) Don´t flirt. Serious is... nice.

9) Give gifts... and value the ones you receive.

10) Everyone knows something you don´t.

11) When you have a chance to take a shower, take a shower.

12) When lacking a shower, go hang out near a fire. (Wow... bathing-related wisdom should really be a whole post unto itself...)

13) State-contracted doctors make around $700 a month. Take your salary seriously.

14) Never eat alone. It´s bad manners and boring. Everything can be shared.

15) You are responsible, accountable, answerable for your wealth: citizenship, education, language, Christian heritage, grace of God. Now, what are you going to do with it?

thought three: the problem with me and Moses... in Peru, E.TX., or anywhere

What should we do when we´re angry... and right to be so?

Not just with trivial things, but with evil? When we've got that "righteous indignation"... With sin-filled hearts? Maybe with the sin-filled, hateful hearts of our babies, for example? When we see wickedness in our fellow humans?

to be continued...

allegorically, i would be Lucy...

2010-07-26T14:25:00.000-05:00

13 Reasons I Could Get Thrown Out of A Delta Airplane

2010-06-05T22:46:00.002-05:00

"By way of example, and without limitation, Delta may refuse to transport or may remove passengers from its aircraft in any of the following situations:

1) When the passenger's conduct is disorderly, abusive or violent
2) When the passenger is barefoot
3) When the passenger appears to be intoxicated or under the influence of drugs
4) When the passenger attempts to interfere with any members of the flight crew in the pursuit of his or her duties, or fails to obey the instruction of any member of the flight crew.
5) When the passenger has a contagious disease that may be transmissible to other passengers during the normal course of the flight
6) When the passenger has a malodorous condition [oh, man... how could i ever live THAT one down?!]
7) When the passenger is unable to sit in a seat with the seatbelt fastened [oh. so no 4th grade boys allowed, apparently.]
8) When the passenger requires an onboard stretcher kit
9) When the passenger's behavior may be hazardous to himself/herself, the crew or other passengers
10) When the passenger is seriously ill, and fails to provide a physician's written permission to fly.
11) When the passenger is traveling in an incubator.
12) When the passenger’s conduct creates an unreasonable risk of offense or annoyance to other passengers. [but "reasonable annoyance" is still okay, right?]
13) When the passenger’s conduct creates risk of harm or damage to the carrier’s aircraft and/or property. [no machete juggling allowed. i get it. i'll wait.]

Desire

2010-05-29T11:02:00.002-05:00

"Desire is often talked about as something we ought to overcome.

Still, being is desiring: our bodies, our minds, our hearts, and our souls are full of desires. Some are unruly, turbulent, and very distracting; some make us think deep thoughts and see great visions; some teach us how to love; and some keep us searching for God.

Our desire for God is the desire that should guide all other desires.

Otherwise, our bodies, minds, hearts, and souls become one another's enemies and our inner lives become chaotic, leading us to despair and self-destruction. Spiritual disciplines are not ways to eradicate all our desires but ways to order them so that they can serve one another and together serve God."

~H. Nouwen

Son of Hamas author interview

2010-05-10T00:36:00.000-05:00

Weekend Interview with Mosab Hassan Yousef: 'They Need to Be Liberated From Their God' - WSJ.com

"you are talking as if you are one of those that we cannot easily convert into an unsuccessful-person-maker"

2010-04-01T17:13:00.005-05:00

March 32, 2010 spelling test: (and you thought school was hard when you were a kid...)

1. supercalifragilisticexpialidocious [man... i keep on spelling it -dotious]
2. antidisestablishmentarianism
3. I
4. paleontologist
5. ontological

thought one:
"In linguistics, agglutination is the morphological process of adding affixes to the base of a word"
(eg: antidisestablishmentarianism)

what do we call the process of adding thoughts to emailed thoughts? "athoughtination?"

thought two: why i can't unwikipediate myself
"A recent addition to the claims has come with the introduction of the following word in Turkish muvaffakiyetsizleştiricileştiriveremeyebileceklerimizdenmişsinizcesine, which means something like (you are talking) as if you are one of those that we cannot easily convert into an unsuccessful-person-maker (someone who un-educates people to make them unsuccessful)."

thought three: but Spanish speakers do indeed smirk, let me assure you...

as far as my provincial spanish pidgin and internet searches can tell, there's no satisfying spanish word for "smirk"?!

thought four: "home phones"

JC: "Do we have to put our number here?"
me: "What?"
JC: "It's says put your 'home phone.' "

i read worksheet: "Use the following pair of homophones in a sentence: see, sea."

thought five: more baby-isms

1)
Science book:
"Cuales son las cinco necesidades basicas de los animales?"
"What are the five basic needs of animals?"

student #9:
"oxigeno, alimento, agua, refugio, y felicidad"
"oxygen, food, water, shelter, and happiness."

2) It must be the laughlines...
My kids were working on a passage talking about music from 1930. One of the girls started to laugh to think about it.
"Miss Hernandez, were you alive in 1930?"
"Yes."
"How old were you? Do you remember the music?"

3) from tutorials:
"Miss Hernandez, can i go to the bathroom?"
"No."
"Please! I'm thirsty!"

4) not sure if this will translate...
kid #17:
"Miss Hernandez... ¿cómo... nació su hermano gringo?¨

5)
Worksheet:
Correct these sentences:
my dad aint here right now
answer:
My dad and my haint ar here right now.
(read it using a silent h)

6)
Worksheet:
Write the antonym for the word below.
cool
student: nervous

thought six: from the announcements

"People show their character by what they laugh at." ~german proverb

...and if we laugh at kids, is that a bad thing or a good?

we could... make lists...

2010-03-21T17:59:00.003-05:00

thought one:
ignorance is a form of oppression.

"Give us grace fearlessly to contend against evil, and to make no peace with oppression..."

thought two:
we could...

love God,
hate Satan,
free the slaves,
stop abortion,
feed the hungry,
clothe the naked and semi-naked,
house the homeless,
adopt the fatherless,
visit the sick,
comfort the imprisoned,
welcome the stranger,
stop evil,
work righteousness,
love our enemies,
do good to the ones who want to kill us,
destroy the works of darkness,
seek the Kingdom,
cast out demons,
heal the sick,
sell all we have and give alms,
bring the lost to Christ,
receive children,
disciple the neophytes,
relish the brotherhood,
honor the [president],
love people,
raise up a generation of God-worshippers,
worship constantly,
pray without ceasing,
rejoice in suffering,
praise continually,
give thanks for all things,
and be perpetually full and overflowing with the life of God,

AND

we are unprofitable servants.
we have done that which was our duty to do.

ni más, ni menos.

or rather, we have done that which was our function to do...

like a bird busy singing all morning and flying all day...
like a tree reaching upward, making flowers in spring and shade in summer...
like the sea all roaring and crashing, then quiet and lapping, teeming with innumerable living things.

these are not nice things with which we might pass the time, si nos da la gana.
for this we breathe, we think, we feel, we speak.

for God...

thought three:
Why should the Gentiles say,

¨So. Where is your God?¨

But our God is in heaven; He does whatever He pleases...¨
[lo que le da la gana...]

oh. and behold what He pleases to do...

-make sunrises.
-invent children.
-give laughter.
-irrigate rainforests.
-ice the tundras.
-snow in Texas.
-blow a breeze on the islands.
-crown the proles with lovingkindness.
-fill mouths with good things.
-deliver from despair.
-free the captives.
-avenge the oppressed.
-give sight to the blind.
-give the speechless a song.
-execute justice for those who suffer violence.
-represent the disenfranchised.
-animate dust.
-open minds.
-mend broken lives.
-heal diseased hearts.
-restore souls.
[you know, like give your soul back to you...]
-redeem from destruction.
[save from the discard pile.]
-give wisdom to idiots.
-educate the ignorant.
-give righteousness to wretches.
-rain on the land of the wicked.
[or let him think a while in an awfully dry one...]
-forgive debts.
-remove iniquities.
-give life to the dead.
-give love to the hated.
-give love to the hateful.
-give worth to the worthless.
-bind wounds.
-gather outcasts,
collect rejects,
select the losers,
...and then populate an invincible Kingdom with them.
-lift the head of the downcast.
-honor the shamed.
-rebuild ruins.
-construct an unshakeable city
[...without using His hands.]
-engineer streams in the desert.
-produce water from a rock.
-rain bread.
-consecrate temples to God in the midst of Babylon.
-bleed and die for the life of the world.

yeah. He's my religion.
What's yours?

Comercial Cafe Altomayo

2010-03-20T17:57:00.001-05:00

memoria de 2006... dig the beauty... this is a good commercial.

The Protesters

2010-03-15T17:17:00.005-05:00

I had a friend once tell me, "Every generation has one great evil they are responsible to fight against.... in the 1800's it was slavery. today, it's... "

i didn't agree with him at the time (so much evil! how to pinpoint one?!), but listening to this song, i was convinced that he is right.

we have our principle evil.

as a church kid, i've heard this issue all my life. i guess it'd be the same as if i was raised in a widow-burning India a few hundred years ago... or on a misson, surrounded by conscientious monks lamenting the exploitation of the natives. or maybe like being in a Southern family who regretted that our black neighbors are commonly considered subhuman... the main difference might be that our generation's great evil is a private one... a medical one... we see only the survivors, not the victims. thusly, i'm generally used to the evil. always regret it, but don't always think of it.

nonetheless, every now and again it hits me. frederica.com has caused some reflection (for instance: anyone born after 1973 could have been legally murdered. we are the survivors of the holocaust... don't we have something to say?!) but this weekend, it was through this song that i was reminded,

"i live in a country that kills our children. i'm pro-woman and pro-children and both are being totally and completely oppressed... murdering and being murdered..."

but what does it mean to fight? i would be willing to tote a sign and march a march, but my schedule won't let me devote myself much to political activism... and i must confess that in the past, the seeming ineffectiveness of that approach has contributed to my apathy. i'm not much for political solutions.

so. here are thoughts. please contribute as well.

Christ's solution? Incarnation and atonement... He knows what it's like to be a baby in a crisis pregnancy... Came, survived His generation's murder of the innocents, and died for all the murderers and murdered of history. for all their life and for all their sin, too.

even if their lives turn out terrible, horrible, grievous (in response to those who think terminating life is the most compassionate response compared to allowing the suffering that is sure to follow), even if their life is filled with horrors and harm, Christ PAID THE PRICE to redeem the worst life from destruction. in other words, they are never without hope. at the end of an oppressed life, they can know that compared to eternity, it is nothing. in the middle of life as an unwanted, unappreciated, unloved human being, they can find everything in the God who loved them enough to a) will them into existence, and b) bleed and die that they might live. forever. with no more tears, no more heartache, no more abuse, no more neglect. He will never leave them nor forsake them.

and it is enough.

the Christian's response?

1) Love the children who did survive pregnancy. Build a life where the existence of children is never an inconvenience. Or where, when their actions or needs become inconvenient (they are children, after all), your life shows, "I was born and redeemed precisely for inconveniences such as these."

2) Love the at-risk group, the unwanted, the unbeautiful, be they 8 or 82. Contribute to the ones who have nothing to contribute. Murder proceeds from the heart. We only kill people after we think them disposable.

3) Educate the youth: Violence is NOT the answer. You do not make either a crime (incest), or a terror (rape) or a "problem" (teenage pregnancy) better by murdering a child. If death might fix the problem, it's not the child who should die. (my texan is showing.) Children must encounter young that fetus = human, and we don't kill innocent humans. This is not hard to do. Equating an unborn child with mere tissue is not something that comes naturally to children. They don't know what tissue is; they think it's a baby.

4) Reason with others of a different mindset. They can give you all sorts of insights into problems we need to be addressing if we want to save children's lives. Find some place to discuss these things. Interrelate with coworkers on more than just an superficial level. People's lives are at stake... as your coworkers believe, so will their children.... and anyone they have intellectual and moral influence on.

5) Work the system as much as possible. (Politics, democracy, etc.)

6) Help women/ girls who are in a crisis pregnancy. Yeah, it's probably not your "responsibility." Yeah, their families, churches, and communities should help, too. I'm just saying, if there's good at your hand to do, do it.

7) Help single mothers who did have the righteousness to bring the child to term. They sinned, but they did not add iniquity. Somehow, cultivate respect for these women.

Think of what these women have endured! Childbirth and child-rearing is not a light experience in the best of circumstances! To decide to do what is oh-so-difficultly right, although you have opportunity to "make it all go away," although you have been abandoned, although your heart is broken for numerous reasons, although your dreams will have to die, although you will lose sleep, although your standard of living and social status will most likely stay at the bottom for the foreseeable future... that is not a decision a coward makes.

Many have been stupider or more unrighteous than they and yet seem to escape the consequences and burdens that these meet full in the face. The absent men, for instance. The girls who are "smart" and use birth control. The "lucky" ones. But these have an incredibly heavy load precisely because they accept responsibility. That should be recognized. Have compassion. If we all received what we deserved and alone had to shoulder the load we have packed with our own sin... ay de nosotros.

even if you don't think that much of the mothers, for the sake of the children, for the sake of society, for the sake of breaking cycles of ignorant sin, step in and provide them with a living, breathing alternative. i didn't say write checks or be stupid or allow others to use you or become an enabler. just step in and represent your Savior. the world has promised this woman much but all it really has to offer involves stealing, killing, and destruction. represent the one who said, "let the little children come to Me, and forbid them not, for of such is the kingdom of heaven." and the kingdom of heaven... is so not overrated. show them how to get to the Father of the fatherless, the Defender of the oppressed. Do not worry that you will have to be their savior; He's capable of sustaining them...

trust me. from the heart of a survivor, i know.

***let me close with a thought from another friend several years back. We know God hates murder. We know God loves help for the helpless. We know God does not merely emote about these things, but is a God who executes justice for all the oppressed. Why does He tarry? Why don't we see plagues breaking out on us? ...Just because He is longsuffering, not willing that any soul should perish, even those of a pro-murder society. But the day of judgment is coming. Sooner for some of us than others. And let us not think of God always judging "them." On the last day, (who knows how far away it will be?) God will judge US... there is no patience for pacifists in the war against evil. let us reflect: "How did we as individuals within a society ... participate in the sins and virtues of that society?"

grading amusements

2010-03-12T01:30:00.003-06:00

i'm grading some essays my students wrote for state mandated english assessments of ESL students. (called TELPAS, for those who care to know.) it's work for everybody involved, but very interesting.

for instance, had i never given the science prompt to "describe 3 animals and explain how they interact with other living and nonliving things," i would never have had several of my students inform me some variation on the theme that "vampires are some of the animals that go in the night. They kill people and sleep on a tree with his feet. The vampires live in a cave because they don't like the day. Some of the vampire drink some bloods of the humans." (i had mercy and edited the above excerpt for spelling.)

see? language is all about connotation... and their little neurons can't think of the concept of BATS without getting the easier accessed word VAMPIRE as well. what blows my mind is that the original excerpt included the silent "e" on vampire... what a world.

from a prompt requiring them to write about their favorite character from Narnia and what they would do did they have a day with that person:

*"If I was in Narnia I was go with Aslan because I want to see the beautiful hair of Aslan."
*"My favorite character was Aslan because he is strong and I want to be like him. And play in the snow."
*"My favorite character is Aslan becasue he was a lion and 'osoom' [sic]. That's why if I was in Narnia I play with Aslan in snowfight and snowman and play the monster."
*"If I was in Narnia, I will take the wand of the witch and make a rock."

from the good ol' "when I grow up..." prompt... less edited:

"When I grow up i wanna be a Presedent. Because I will have alot of money but i don't care how many money I have. The only thing is my career of presedent i care. I can give money to stores so they can pay more two the workers. I can even low down teh price of the gas station for one dollar. If I were presendent I will do everything for people so they can live better in the whole world. Like Barack Obama, but more better than him. ...I will be good and if they say that we don't sell beers we will not sell beers or we will put army where they pass a state to another state so they can't pass drugs or weapons to Texas...."

[personally quite entertaining:] "I would like to be a teacher because I can take my class to recess and be nice to them. And give them a little bit of homework and so I can print stuff. I would give them a assignment in the morning. And if they don't do their homework I do not let them go to P.E. If they do it I will let them go to recess for a extra 10 minutes. If they are really good, I will make a pizza party. [that child, brilliant boy, TOTALLY PUT THE COMMA AFTER THE INTRODUCTORY CLAUSE ALL BY HIMSELF. wow. i'm seriously impressed. in case the all caps didn't give that away...] When they are bad I give them soem work to do. If they are normal I will give them fun stuff to do and some work. And in Fridays I will not give them any work or homework. I will be good teacher. [Unlike which bad-giver-of-homework-on-weekends, dear?] I will never be mean unless they are bad. And I will give them rewards for being good. Like some designed pencil. And in the end of school I will give them something."

... one assignment was for them to write about their P.E. class last Friday. What a fascinating thing it is to read 16 children's portrayals of one 45 minute period. How different they all think! How telling is their description of others... wow...

verbal thought: 15 chimes in again

today, during a movie, #15 would/could not stop commenting. now, normally, i'm a big movie-talker myself and thusly have a high tolerance for it. today was different and some of the more silent of my students were perturbed. "miss h, can you move the ppl. who are talking?!"

so i did. he talked less, but still he continued. i periodically sent withering stares his way. sometimes he'd trail off into a "sorry" and return his attention to the movie. one time, he totally destroyed my ferocious glare by excitedly finishing his train of thought and then punctuating it with a matter-of-fact, "i'm done now," and turning back to the movie. so much for "the look." i think i need a spring break to polish it up...

skype, pineapples, and talking munchkins

2010-02-27T13:25:00.001-06:00

thought one: sorry... skype just can't fix everything...

3. What You should and should not expect from Skype
3.1 No Warranties:
Installing Skype Software enables You to communicate with other people. Skype
cannot guarantee that You will always be able to communicate with other people,
nor can Skype guarantee that You can communicate without disruptions, delays or
communication-related flaws or that all Your communications shall always be
delivered to other people.

hahahaha. is that as funny to other people as it is to me? that is seriously funny to me. somethings are just operator problems, i guess. don't sue them.

5.You should not submit comments or keywords or any information that is
unlawful, offensive, abusive, indecent, obscene, racist, discriminatory or
menacing or which does, or is intended to, cause annoyance, inconvenience or
worry, or which is fraudulent or defamatory.

so that's the part where we take a vow of silence...

thought two: epiphanies from science worksheets

it just hit me... a pineapple plant takes in sunshine and makes... pineapples.

what a wonderful world. makes me want to be a little more productive myself. what do i do with sunshine?!

thought three: munchkinisms

me to munchkin #18, who was back in his old spot after having been removed for reasons of excessive verbosity:
"didn't i move you forever and ever?"

munchkin 18:
"i get lonely."

***

when i read in the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe about the witch's mob shaving Aslan:
munchkin 5, distressed: "Aghh! They turned him into a girl!"

***

munchkin 18, during an intense part in the same chapter:

"i need a moment."

A Hymn: O God of Earth and Altar

2010-02-17T18:11:00.002-06:00

A Hymn: O God of Earth and Altar

O God of earth and altar,
Bow down and hear our cry,
Our earthly rulers falter,
Our people drift and die;
The walls of gold entomb us,
The swords of scorn divide,
Take not thy thunder from us,
But take away our pride.

From all that terror teaches,
From lies of tongue and pen,
From all the easy speeches
That comfort cruel men,
From sale and profanation
Of honour and the sword,
From sleep and from damnation,
Deliver us, good Lord.

Tie in a living tether
The prince and priest and thrall,
Bind all our lives together,
Smite us and save us all;
In ire and exultation
Aflame with faith, and free,
Lift up a living nation,
A single sword to thee.

- G.K. Chesterton

gracias, Timber.

you know it's thursday when...

2010-02-11T12:46:00.003-06:00

you find yourself ...

~thinking: "Why is he going so slow? oh yeah... it's snowing... and we're on a bridge... and those are those things that freeze...Thank God for people smarter than I..."

~saying: "You need to have your test finished before we go to LeTournity.... i mean..."

~ collecting: in my brain i collect things that are not overrated. snow is on that list. how good to be alive in a world where snow exists...

~ snowballing: children are also on that list. and children + snow = numb fingers, wet hair, and these wonderful things we remember all through our lives....

bendito sea Dios, Father of all good and perfect gifts...
like Thursdays, for example.

skype, pineapples, and talking munchkins

2010-01-30T22:57:00.005-06:00

thought one: i'm sorry... skype just can't fix everything...

3. What You should and should not expect from Skype
3.1 No Warranties: Installing Skype Software enables You to communicate with other people. Skype cannot guarantee that You will always be able to communicate with other people, nor can Skype guarantee that You can communicate without disruptions, delays or communication-related flaws or that all Your communications shall always be delivered to other people.

hahahaha. is that as funny to other people as it is to me? that is seriously funny to me. somethings are just operator problems, i guess. don't sue them.

5.You should not submit comments or keywords or any information that is unlawful, offensive, abusive, indecent, obscene, racist, discriminatory or menacing or which does, or is intended to, cause annoyance, inconvenience or worry, or which is fraudulent or defamatory.

so that's the part where we take a vow of silence...

thought two: epiphanies from science worksheets

it just hit me... a pineapple plant takes in sunshine and makes... pineapples.

what a wonderful world. makes me want to be a little more productive myself. what do i do with sunshine?!

thought three: munchkinisms

me to munchkin #18, who was back in his old spot after having been removed for reasons of excessive verbosity:
"didn't i move you forever and ever?"

munchkin 18:
"i get lonely."

***

when i read in the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe about the witch's mob shaving Aslan:
munchkin 5, distressed: "Aghh! They turned him into a girl!"

***

munchkin 18, during an intense part in the same chapter:

"i need a moment."

give America del Sur a listen...

2010-01-28T15:28:00.001-06:00

apparently via San Diego, but i'm not complaining.

Dominic Balli - Drink For Free

2010-01-18T14:42:00.002-06:00

"why do you spend your money (come to the waters) on what is not bread? (come to the waters) and your wages (come to the waters... drink for free...) on what does not satisfy? (come to the waters...)"

any friend of the prophets is a friend of mine...

Fear, Justice, and Gov't Agencies

2010-01-13T17:16:00.004-06:00

man... i love Christmas.

2009-12-01T15:28:00.001-06:00

listen to the girl lay on the violin...!

¨You have permission to fight...

2009-10-31T22:28:00.002-05:00

...evil.¨

Almighty God, who hast created man in Thine own image; Grant us grace fearlessly to contend against evil, and to make no peace with oppression; and, that we may reverently use our freedom, help us to employ it in the maintenance of justice among men and nations, to the glory of Thy holy Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord...

Almighty God, our heavenly Father, who declarest Thy glory and showest forth Thy handiwork in the heavens and in the earth; Deliver us, we beseech Thee, in our several callings, from the service of mammon, that we may do the work which Thou givest us to do, in truth, in beauty, and in righteousness, with singleness of heart as Thy servants, and to the benefit of our fellow men; for the sake of Him who came among us as one that serveth, Thy Son Jesus Christ our Lord...

We beseech Thee to hear us, good Lord...

That it may please Thee to strengthen such as do stand; and to comfort and help the weak-hearted; and to raise up those who fall; and finally to beat down Satan under our feet;

We beseech Thee to hear us, good Lord...

Amen.

guerrilla and beautiful... amen, amen, amen.

"Shoefiti":Wiki gives the lowdown on shoe tossing

2009-10-15T17:06:00.004-05:00

Just in:

"Shoe tossing has been observed in areas of the United States, Germany, France, Colombia, Canada, Czech Republic, Britain, Spain, Australia, New Zealand, Argentina, Brazil, Finland, Mexico, Peru, Ecuador, India, Ireland, Israel, Norway, Sweden, Romania, Guatemala and Venezuela"

"Since 2003 the sport has been practiced competitively in Eastern Europe. The 2004 World Championship Competition was won by Germany who is hosting the 2005 Competition at Döbeln. Teams were also expected from Sweden, Estonia and Russia. Boot throwing has been a popular sport in Finland since 1976 when the first Finnish Championships of boot throwing has been organized."

"A number of sinister explanations have been proposed as to why this is done....."

[must read to believe!]

Faces of the Planet

2009-09-01T08:26:00.001-05:00

indigestion?!

2009-08-29T19:07:00.002-05:00

thought one:

Monday was the first time i've ever wanted to cry for joy. i had often read in books of people doing this but had never felt the inclination. it rather took me off guard; "what is this, indigestion?!?" i said. then i realized, "Oh. Love at first week. i gotcha." it's just... somebody decided to give me the best-looking, sweetest, most sincere, uber-interested, hardest-working kids in our district. [my brother informs me i'm on my honeymoon.]

"let not the one who puts on his armor boast like the one who takes it off." i'm not boasting; i'm amazed. they're beautiful...

wednesday, going through our social studies book, i hear this, "coooool! que chido, mira! i love this book. Miss Hernandez, can i take the book home, please?!"

as we hurried through 400 years of Texas history, i see something out of a dream: all these little brown/beige faces, eyes wide, eyebrows lifted, mouths open. (i do not exaggerate.)

(just wait until we get to the Mexican War. things are gonna get emotional.)

after we discuss a picture of a very groovy-looking Presidente Antonio Lopez de Santa Ana, (Texans know who i'm talking about), i gaze around the room to see several of my hoodlums with their uniform collars "popped"... early 1800's, Santa Ana- style.

now, tell me please how i'm not supposed to gush.

thought two:

sometimes our proximity to a person takes away our compassion for them. i dunno how to explain it, but i've seen it in my own life.

maybe, with certain persons, we should write our a brief summary of their "story"- why they need us to show them compassion- and then do so, regardless of their personality, baggage, or how they've rubbed us in the past. because, really, what ARE we here for if not to rescue the perishing/ care for the dying, regardless of their congeniality, cooperation, or general likeableness?

all the perks of life can be done in heaven. i can know God in heaven. ditto "suck the marrow out of life." i can eat good foods, enjoy good friends, think good thoughts, love beautiful things... in heaven. and while it's nice to get previews of all that here, the only real things i can't do in heaven are the hard things here: walk by faith, not sight; endure persecution; call people out of darkness and into life; and love those who get no love.

THAT'S IT FOLKS.

let me know if i missed something.

(besides sin and marriage, etc.)

thought three:

on recent birthdays (of others), i've started to have this sadness.... this awareness... that one more year of life means one year closer to death. likewise, even as i celebrate 1 week completed with my kiddos, i realized that's 1 week less i have to spend with them... and 1 week closer (for them) to adolescence, adulthood, and the ugly wretchedness of the world that wants to eat them.

Time, you are not my friend.

but blessed be God that He does not change! He'll never leave. Christ already did death and is now definitely, extremely, irrevocably alive. Thank You, heavenly Companion, that You will not die on me. O, that all my beloveds be brethren with just an ugly river and some tough years to pass before we meet again on the other side...

why "they should just learn english" is not so easy...

2009-08-08T16:07:00.002-05:00

(from a bilingual test prep manual)

"Reasons Why the English Language is Hard to Learn":

The bandage was wound around the wound.

The farm was used to produce produce.

The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

He could lead if he would get the lead out.

The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

I did not object to the object.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

They were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when the does are present.

A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

After a number of injections my jaw got number.

Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

[English!]

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible? And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?

and that's not even getting into phonics... egh. now, go have sympathy on English language learners, and be glad you picked this stuff up without having to think about it. (and thank goodness we're not immigrating to Iceland...)

Eso es mi Rey...

2009-07-23T14:48:00.001-05:00

memento mori

2009-07-17T15:52:00.010-05:00

thought one: Google's Chinese Censorship

"In a Freedom House report, China tied Cuba for last place out of 15 countries
studied for online access. The report said the government often blocks foreign
sites, but it notes other sites like Google have agreed to self-censor to
satisfy government demands in China. But even if Chinese officials censor
images like the lone man facing the tanks, the moment was sealed in 1989: The
world had witnessed the desperate defiance of a muted people against a crushing
system. "
~"The Tiananmen generation," world magazine, 6 june '09

visually, that means this...

what we see:
"tiananmen square" : google.com (google.us) pics from link in heading

what they see:

"tiananmen square" : google.cn

1) ... and i think, "what could be censored by google (et al.) here in the states? after all, i'm sitting in america reading about Chinese censorship. doubtful Chinese citizens know what all's not showing up on their bright little screens... how do i know what's not showing up on mine? makes me want to search for subversive things, like... ???

2) how do we know history is not just like any other story? how do we know the news is not pure 1984esque propaganda? i mean, we know it's biased, but how do we know it's not lies? [oooh. maybe this is how conspiracy people think.]

3) my word, but we depend on multiplicity of witness. and truth. que vivan los eyewitnesses... and que viva la truth."

thought two: sustainable faith, part i (from Mother's Day '09)

on this here day of motherly rememberment, i'm reminded of something i've wanted to post for a good while. this idea has haunted me since it first started pillaging my head: what will it take to have sustainable faith?

sustainable faith... i'll go from particulars to an attempt at a universal at the end. but simply put, sustainable faith is just the Faith... but heavy, not lite.

~ It is being woken up [early!] day after day in Peru to the voice of a hero in the other room praising God with full heart, "mi alma te adora, Jehova mi Dios... bendito sea Jehova..."

~ it is witnessing two men of God, par excellence, preach the word to near empty churches "as a dying man to dying men, and as if sure to never preach again." and then watching them go home and live it.

~ it is my mother's habit of waking up at 4:30 a.m., with or without insomnia, simply because she wants to spend time with Jesus.

~ it is a sister-in-law who cries for the people that others only gossip about. whose floor and whose God only know the tears she's shed and prayers she's lifted for... me and my salvation... for so many more.

~ it is also the college-kid run discipleship house i so loved to go to as a child. it is guitars and laughter and praise choruses and friday night Bible studies.

~ it is fellowship sunday and how everybody won't go home after the meal because they can't seem to stop talking.

~ it is talking to brethren for hours about... God. the flesh. salvation. the harvest. fasting. prayer.

~ it is The Compound and making subversive plans to promote a kingdom that can never be destroyed in the midst of a dying republic. oh, that and planning strategic ways to destroy the works of satan, punch in the teeth of the wicked, and snatch the helpless from the jaws of the oppressor.

~ it is that completely folksy, unabashedly evangelical, and how wonderful "holy handshake" where someone grabs your hand, blesses you, and walks away leaving a hundred dollar bill in your happy palm.

Sustainable faith is the faith that shames me. the faith that first arrested my attention and convinced me, "i am nothing. God is everything. and... i want THAT." the faith that gives worth to little mexican 8 year olds who don't do capitalization and only occasionally believe in punctuation. Sustainable faith is Christ and everybody that looks like Him, on good days, but on really, really dark days as well. it is early morning faith. hard floor faith. cold air faith. communal and oh-so-alone faith. it's that faith that makes me believe i'll ever be an 81 year old Christian. it's the faith that makes me wonder if i'll ever become an 81 year old Christian. it's impossible faith. it's so hopeful. so diligent. so generally unrewarded. so patient under tribulations faith. so self- denying my flesh breaks out in hives just thinking about it.

Sustainable faith is that walk with God that can both train and addict the little ones. it's a faith that will convince any progeny i might ever be entrusted with that God exists, He has spoken, and that is the biggest deal in the universe.

yes, salvation is in God's hands. but i will dread to be in His as well if i ignore the fact that the salvation i have received is to be passed down... not by magic. not by wishing. but by grace fleshed out. morning after morning. with a headache. at a party. when people get on my nerves. when i can't keep my eyes open. when i've had caffeine. when i'm depressed. when i'm giddy. when i have no money. when i have abundance. God, grant me a faith that walks in hard times just as steady as in good ones.

thought three: sustainable faith part ii- what will it take?

so. what will it take? let it be known i'm generally a very happy Christian. especially with coffee, i can take on the world. but i am also 21 years old and in excellent health. i have the most minimal demands upon my time and emotions that can be imagined in this day and age. i have a great job that i look forward to going to every day. my church is loving and full of truth. my family... is unrivalled in wonderfulness. i am offered three square meals a day. i can buy or order virtually any food my heart desires. (*accept for ceviche from a certain kitchen in the Andes. but even then, at this exact moment, i could go to kayak.com and order a ticket to get myself there, and be there within the month.) ditto books. ditto gadgets. i could get a credit card and get even more. i have a degree. i have minimal debt. i have no problems.

so what is my faith worth? is it sustainable? how on earth can i tell when it's never been tested? how do i know that this stuff within me would survive a day in a concentration camp? could bear to attend the funeral of a loved one? could outlast personal assault or injury? could endure through a disease? or a famine? or persecution? or abandonment? how do i know it's real?

i really don't know.

but try to tell my flesh "no," firmly, to any little thing it really wants and see my happiness and devotion come crashing down. see the monster unloosed that is me. oh. i thought she had died. ech. word, but she stinketh.

how to deal with that? is it possible to be a world-class Christian in the 1st world? to have a faith that translates, travels, and endures?

we shall see...

03/2011 post thought: this post, in video and song

Cannots and Cans

2009-07-17T13:31:00.003-05:00

The 10 Cannots
By William J. H. Boetcker (wrongfully attributed to Abraham Lincoln)

You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
You cannot help the poor man by destroying the rich.
You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
You cannot build character and courage by taking away man’s initiative and independence.
You cannot help small men by tearing down big men.
You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income.
You cannot establish security on borrowed money.
And you cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they can and should do for themselves.

10 Cans (not just 2)

You can learn a lot about happiness when thrift is necessary.
You can strengthen the weak by training them how to be strong.
You can help the poor man when you are not obsessed with riches.
You can further the brotherhood of man by seeing persons rather than class.
You can build character and courage by risk and allegience to something greater than yourself.
You can help small men by being a big man who cares.
You can lift the wage earner by teaching him what wage payers are willing to pay for.
You can get in lots of trouble by spending more than your income.
You can establish security when you're fixed on a unshakeable Kingdom made without hands- invisible or otherwise.
And you can help men, their families, and their grandchildren permanently by letting them do what they can and should do for themselves.

Nostalgia

2009-06-12T15:58:00.009-05:00

"Oy! Did you go to a wedding or to a funeral?!"

2009-05-20T16:43:00.003-05:00

Chrysostom weighs in:

(link bootlegged from a superlative post on marriage)

¨[God] did not, on the one hand, fashion woman independently from man, otherwise man would think of her as essentially different from himself. Nor did He enable woman to bear children without man; if this were the case she would be self-sufficient. Instead, just as the branches of a tree proceed from a single trunk, He made the one man Adam to be the origin of all mankind, both male and female, and made it impossible for men and women to be self-sufficient. Later, He forbade men to marry their sisters or daughters, so that our love would not be limited to members of our families, and withdrawn from the rest of the human race.

The love of husband and wife is the force that welds society together. Men will take up arms and even sacrifice their lives for the sake of this love. St. Paul would not speak so earnestly about this subject without serious reason; why else would he say, Wives, be subject to your husbands, as to the Lord? Because when harmony prevails, the children are raised well, the household is kept in order, and neighbors, friends and relatives praise the result. Great benefits, both for families and states, are thus produced. When it is otherwise however, everything is thrown into confusion and turned upside down. When the generals of an army are at peace with each other, everything proceeds in an orderly fashion, and when they are not, everything is in disarray. It is the same here. ...

You have heard how important obedience is; you have praised and marveled at Paul, how he welds our whole life together, as we would expect from an admirable and spiritual man. You have done well. But now listen to what else he requires from you; he has not finished with his example. Husbands, he says, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church. You have seen the amount of obedience necessary; now hear about the amount of love necessary. Do you want your wife to be obedient to you, as the Church is to Christ? Then be responsible for the same providential care of her, as Christ is for the Church. And even if it becomes necessary for you to give your life for her, yes, and even to endure and undergo suffering of any kind, do not refuse. Even though you undergo all this, you will never have done anything equal to what Christ has done. You are sacrificing yourself for someone to whom you are already joined, but He offered Himself up for one who turned her back on Him and hated Him.

In the same way, then, as He honored her by putting at His feet one who turned her back on Him, who hated, rejected, and disdained Him, as [H]e accomplished this not with threats, or violence, or terror, or anything else like that, but through His untiring love; so also you should behave toward your wife. Even if you see her belittling you, or despising and mocking you, still you will be able to subject her to yourself, through affection, kindness, and your great regard for her. There is no influence more powerful than the bond of love, especially for husband and wife. A servant can be taught submission through fear; but even he, if provoked too much, will soon seek his escape. But one's partner for life, the mother of one's children, the source of one's every joy, should never be fettered with fear and threats, but with love and patience. What kind of marriage can there be when the wife is afraid of her husband? What sort of satisfaction could a husband himself have, if he lives with his wife as if she were a slave, and not with a woman by her own free will? Suffer anything for her sake, but never disgrace her, for Christ never did this with the Church. /.../

But how is this behavior achieved? That it must be is clear; now I will tell you how. It will be achieved if we are detached from money, if we strive above everything for virtue, if we keep the fear of God before our eyes. What Paul says to servants in the next chapter applies to us as well, ...knowing that whatever good anyone does, he will receive the same again from the Lord (Eph. 6:8). Love her not so much for her own sake, but for Christ's sake. That is why he says, be subject...as to the Lord. Do everything for the Lord's sake, in a spirit of obedience to Him. ...

A wife should never nag her husband: "You lazy coward, you have no ambition! Look at our relatives and neighbors; they have plenty of money. Their wives have far more than I do." Let no wife say any such thing; she is her husband's body, and it is not for her to dictate to her head, but to submit and obey. "But why should she endure poverty?" some will ask. If she is poor, let her console herself by thinking of those who are much poorer still. If she really loved her husband, she would never speak to him like that, but would value having him close to her more than all the gold in the world....Furnish your house neatly and soberly. If the bridegroom shows his wife that he takes no pleasure in worldly excess, and will not stand for it, their marriage will remain free from the evil influences that are so popular these days. Let them shun the immodest music and dancing that are currently so fashionable.

I am aware that many people think me ridiculous for giving such advice; but if you listen to me, you will understand the advantages of a sober lifestyle more and more as time goes on. You will no longer laugh at me, but will laugh instead at the way people live now like silly children or drunken men.

What is our duty, then? Remove from your lives shameful, immodest, and Satanic music, and don't associate with people who enjoy such profligate entertainment. When your bride sees your manner of life, she will say to herself, "Wonderful! What a wise man my husband is! He regards this passing life as nothing; he bas married me to be a good mother for his children and a prudent manager of his household."

Will this sort of life be distasteful for a young bride? Only perhaps for the shortest time, and soon she will discover how delightful it is to live this way. She will retain her modesty if you retain yours. Don't engage in idle conversations; it never profits anyone to talk too much. ...

Tell [your wife] that you are convinced that money is not important, that only thieves thirst for it constantly, that you love her more than gold; and indeed an intelligent, discreet and pious young woman is worth more than all the money in the world. [and vice versa, eh.]

Show her that you value her company, and prefer being at home to being out. Esteem her in the presence of your friends and children.
Pray together at home and go to Church;
when you come back home, let each ask the other the meaning of the readings and the prayers.

If you are overtaken by poverty, remember Peter and Paul, who were more honored than kings or rich men, though they spent their lives in hunger and thirst.

Remind one another that nothing in life is to be feared, except offending God. If your marriage is like this, your perfection will rival the holiest of monks...

What sort of person do you think the children of such parents will be? What kind of person are all the others who associate with them? Will they not eventually be the recipients of countless blessings as well? For generally the children acquire the character of their parents, are formed in the mold of their parents' temperament, love the same things their parents love, talk in the same fashion, and work for the same ends. ... ¨

****

"Y el Señor encamine vuestros corazones al amor de Dios, y a la paciencia de Cristo." amén.

¡Cataplúm!

2009-05-14T17:35:00.001-05:00

Bulldozing from sea to shining sea...

2009-05-14T17:34:00.001-05:00

News from Peru

2009-05-14T16:34:00.005-05:00

1) A country of seven million mothers... 162,000 of whom are between the ages of 12 - 19... (if that number were miles instead of souls, we could round the earth six and a half times with it...)

49% of the country's mothers are unmarried... 34% (of the total) are "cohabitating"

2) There are 0 confirmed cases of H1N1 in Peru. [as of whenever this was first published. now, as of 05.26.09, there are 27. pray, lets?

3) The Jonas Brothers are playing Lima. twice. as my little jorge says, "boo-yah."

4) Congreso could approve a 5-day "paternity leave" so fathers can be with their families during the momentous occasion(s).

5) "Chavist" is apparently an adjective now. (eg: ant-chavist marches, Chavist candidates, Chavist socialism.)

oh, the envy... i want my own adjective, too, blast it all.

6) Coming up soon: the long awaited Southern Inter-oceanic Highway! (tune in around 2010) Beka can drive to Brazil! No, wait; scratch that... Beka can ride, prayerfully, deliriously, feverishly altitude sick, to Brasil!

7) when one doesn't publish in a blog for, say, 2.5 years and then starts publishing like mad, one can be misidentified as a spammer. who knew?

affidavits, Aunt Dot, and grace

2009-05-07T17:23:00.001-05:00

thought one: the reason i could never go into law...

Applicant's Affidavit:

"I, Fulano de Tal, do hereby agree, consent and direct that any person or entity maintaining information in any form relating to my criminal history shall release all such information upon the request of the Magistorium.

I do further hereby agree and permit the Magistorium to obtain from any person or entity information relating to my personal background, my moral character and my worthiness to instruct the youth of this empire, including by medically suspect neuroimaging, and do hereby expressly direct that any such person or entity, including my subconscious, release such information upon the request of the Magistorium.

I do hereby release, discharge, and exonerate the Magistorium, its agents or representatives, and any person or entity so furnishing information from any and all liability of every kind arising therefrom.

I do furthermore hereby refuse to engage myself or my students in any activity that could be termed subversive by the Magistorium. I agree to subject every declarative statement or rhetorical interrogation on my part by the benevolent statements and intents of the Official Code of the Magistorium which I carry firmly imbedded in my mind. I understand that failing to recite and committ to rote memory no less than three statements diurnally the Official Code of the Magistorium can result in my expulsion from the empire and in revocation of my license of instruction.

The foregoing consent and release is valid and binding so long as I hold or seek any certificate, license, permit, or other credential issued under the authority of aforementioned Official Code of the Magistorium or am living within three hundred light years of the Empire.

I understand that any credential issued to me by the Magistorium is the property of the Empire. I agree that I will tender my credential and/or life's blood to the Magistorium if I am ordered to do so by the Magistorium.

I understand that a copy of this affidavit shall have the same force as the original. I have reviewed this application and I affirm that all of the information which I have provided on the application is true under a fairly rigid definition of true."

... is because i have no sense of decorum....

thought two: ...thusly must i turn to education...

For we let our young men and women go out unarmed, in a day when armor was never so necessary. By teaching them all to read, we have left them at the mercy of the printed word. By the invention of the film and the radio, we have made certain that no aversion to reading shall secure them from the incessant battery of words, words, words.
They do not know what the words mean;
they do not know how to ward them off or blunt their edge or fling them back; they are prey to words in their emotions instead of being the masters of them in their intellects.
We who were scandalized in 1940 when men were sent to fight armored tanks with rifles, are not scandalized when young men and women are sent into the world to fight massed propaganda with a smattering of "subjects"; and when whole classes and whole nations become hypnotized by the arts of the spellbinder, we have the impudence to be astonished.
We dole out lip-service to the importance of education lip service and, just occasionally, a little grant of money; we postpone the school-leaving age, and plan to build bigger and better schools; the teachers slave concientiously in and out of school hours; and yet, as I believe, all this devoted effort is largely frustrated, because we
have lost the tools of learning, and in their absence can only make a botched
and piecemeal job of it.

~ Dorothy Sayers, The Lost Tools of Learning

Ladies and caballeros, that is writing.

thought three: let us pray

ALMIGHTY God, we beseech Thee, with Thy gracious favour to behold our universities, colleges, and schools, that knowledge may be increased among us, and all good learning flourish and abound. Bless all who teach and all who learn; and grant that in humility of heart they may ever look unto Thee, who art the fountain of all wisdom; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

ALMIGHTY God, our heavenly Father, who hast committed to Thy holy Church the care and nurture of Thy children; Enlighten with Thy wisdom those who teach and those who learn, that rejoicing in the knowledge of Thy truth, they may worship Thee and serve Thee from generation to generation; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

ALMIGHTY God, who dost embrace children with the arms of Thy mercy, and dost make them living members of Thy Church; Give them grace, we pray Thee, to stand fast in Thy faith, to obey Thy word, and to abide in Thy love; that, being made strong by Thy Holy Spirit, they may resist temptation and overcome evil, and may rejoice in the life that now is, and dwell with Thee in the life that is to come; through thy merits, O merciful Saviour, who with the Father and the Holy Ghost livest and reignest one God, world without end.

notes:
~teaching to involve rejoicing
~education to involve strengthening

~teaching...to involve humility
~education... looking to Almighty God
~teaching to link generation to generation with a certain telos
~The Holy Church responsible!

afghan girl

2009-05-04T16:15:00.003-05:00

Watch Out My Children

2009-04-24T17:06:00.001-05:00

"Confuscius says, 'That is not advisable.' " - el Turi

2009-04-08T16:09:00.005-05:00

thought one: on education, link courtesy el Turi

"[...] education [...] should take place under 'conditions of direction and restraint designed to provoke habits of attention, concentration, exactness, courage, patience, and discrimination' "

"Scientific, historical, philosophical, and poetic voices contribute, each voice expressing 'a distinct . . . understanding of the world and a distinct idiom of human self-understanding.' Education enables the student to participate in the 'endless unrehearsed intellectual adventure' of that conversation."

"[...a curriculum based on] grammar, logic, and rhetoric. Medieval theorists applied these categories literally to the study of language, but Sayers treated them more metaphorically, claiming that every subject has its grammar, logic, and rhetoric.

Grammar => observation and memory
the mastery of foundational facts;

Dialectic => reason
examines the connections between facts;
Rhetoric => student’s creativity channeled
expresses the facts and logical connections with persuasive elegance."

"Young children love to learn facts, to chant repetitively, to recite. Grammar fits neatly into that stage. As children move from the grammatical “Poll-Parrot” to the “Pert” stage, they delight in “contradicting, answering back, liking to ‘catch people out’ (especially one’s elders),” and so are ready to have their pertness refined by formal logic. As they enter puberty, they become dreamily, poetically self-expressive, and they gain some sense of the unity of knowledge. Rhetoric then becomes an appropriate study. "

[i love that cheeky stage, darling little hoodlums. the dreamy, poetic phase... not so much.]

thought two:

kulturkampf- /ku 'tour kahmpf/ n.

culture struggle; culture war, i.e. war of the secular state against the Church

It comes from the Bismarck's pro-secularism anti-Catholicism laws in the mid-1800s. (which are thought to have been influenced by Masons, imaginate.)

"Among the measures taken to reduce the influence of the Catholic Church
was the addition in 1871 to the German Criminal Code... which threatened
clergy who discussed politics from the pulpit with two years of prison;
this article was dubbed the Kanzelparagraph (from the German Kanzel —
"pulpit")."

"In March 1872 religious schools were forced to undergo official government
inspection and in June religious teachers were banned from government schools. "

"The “May Laws” or Falk Laws of 1873 gave responsibility for the
training and appointment of clergy to the state, which resulted in the
closing of nearly half of the seminaries in Prussia by 1878. "

"In 1875, marriage became a mandatory civil ceremony, removed from the
control of the Church."

thought three: fear of Hell? hope of Paradise?

"If I worship You for fear of Hell, burn me in Hell,
and if I worship You in hope of Paradise, exclude me from Paradise.
But if I worship You for Your Own sake,
grudge me not Your everlasting Beauty.”

~ Rabia al Basri, 8th century Sufi mystic

a couple years ago, i came across this quote and was very intrigued by it. in the months that followed, i found it a compelling topic of conversation. the general response was, "wow... i dunno if i could say the same, but wow..." (dynamic equivalent)

then i went to Peru that summer, and The Family and i discussed it one day. i asked them what they thought, whether they would still follow Christ if they were not guaranteed heaven, if they would still go to hell.

they laughed.

"that's why we left Catholicism! because Christ does save us from hell and take us to heaven..." Sister Rosalvina said.

"you know, i think i would still lead a moral life because it brings its own good, but be a Christian...? no... i don't think so." remarked Abel.

"ha! if i didn't fear hell i'd be on the street right now, five wives, no problem." another brother said.

i was initially surprised; this folks practice the exact opposite of Christianity-lite. but i think it's because of that entrega, that pagando el precio, that esfuerzo... the more you invest, the more something is worth to you... the more worth it had better have. if your Christianity hurts your flesh and costs you, it had better be for more than psychological stability because that's not always given. Christians are long-term folk... like, eternity long-term. if eternity is a moot point to us, than we are probably pretty pointless to eternity ourselves.

yes, following Christ will cost you. He's His own reward, true, but we err in thinking heaven as something apart from Him... it's Him anticipated, Him practiced for, Him trained to know and worship. [digression: and in heaven... no more sin. no more iniquity. no more hardness of heart and shortsightedness of mind. no more faithlessness. no more disappointing. no more failing the only One who left heaven and braved hell for us. that's my God's holy heaven.] And when, honestly, that hope gets dim, and circumstances are wearisome or greiveous or distracting, thank God that we have hell to fear and bring perspective to our shortsightedness.

i'm wordy, which is why i haven't written much lately. however, i close...

"If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men the most pitiable."
~ st. paul

"But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear ye him."
~ Jesus, Savior and God

"I go to prepare a place for you.
And if I go and prepare a place for you,
I will come again and receive you to Myself;

that where I am, there you may be also."

~The Same Christ

2009-03-24T07:50:00.001-05:00

"Notification Alert:

Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas,
oil, as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the
Tunnel has been turned off.

We apologize for the inconvenience."

new fotos

2009-03-05T17:30:00.004-06:00

Mariluz in a doorway
Originally uploaded by larebe2008

newly posted, that is. not new, no, not new at all.

Sunday afternoon car rides with a 6 year old

2009-03-02T16:01:00.004-06:00

... pardon me: THE 6 year old.

Tia: "Bracy, if you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?"

Bracy: "Country, state, or city?"

Tia: "Country."

Bracy: "Peru."

Tia: "Really?! Why?"

Bracy: "Awww. You know..."

Tia: "I know why I'd go. Tell me why you'd go."

Bracy: "Because... you know... it's like...

...

heaven."

amen, brother Bracy... amen.

for illustrated details, click here

V-day Eve

2009-02-06T16:23:00.004-06:00

each month, my four little non-English speakers make a calendar. last month, Gabriel-the-Precocious received (only) a ninety for it because he put "too little color and too many guns." (i don't know why he associated January with guns, but he's male and nine and Mexican and he put a bunch of guns on there.)

this month, i glanced at his February calendar, none to pleased to find... guns adorning the heading.

"Ummm... Gabriel? Do you remember what i told you last month?"

"Siiiii, maestra. They're not bullets. They're arrows..."

"What?"

"Look! They're not bullets; They're arrows coming out of the gun. See? There's Cupido shooting people to make them fall in love!"

Well, ain't that precious.

paramnesia

2009-01-26T16:35:00.007-06:00

thought one: social capitalizers, part ii

5. Help fix someone's flat tire. At least check on somebody who's stranded. Offer to let them use your phone. Also: carry around jumper cables and offer them when necessary.

11. Give people rides. Especially women and children. Come on; that's a no-brainer.

12. Become an organ donor or blood marrow donor. Ooh, my family doesn't like this one. Respect family, but if they don't care, donate away.

13. Get to know your children's teachers. Or neighborhood kids (and their parents, but kids are easier). Offer them cookies. Give them something interesting to play with that doesn't have a ™ after it.

14. Start a monthly [coffee] group. It said "tea," but coffee's better for relationships.

15. Take a class at a community college. Probably THE easiest way to connect.

16. Get to know the clerks and salespeople at your local stores. Go to the same check-out person.

17. Give your park a weatherproof chess/checkers board. That's just cute.

18. Call your friends just to check on them.
"Was there something in particular you needed?" -el Turi

19. Give to your local food bank.

20. Talk civily to the people who come to your door. Ask questions. "What do you mean by.... salvation/ hell/ Jesus/ God..." "How do you know what you believe is true?" "Where do you get your information from?" "How did you come to that conclusion?" "What happens if you're wrong?" "Have you ever considered...."

thought two:

enhorabuena: Sp. Interjection: congratulations

thought three: better than cow tipping: high times and misdemeanors in easternish

ummm... virtue lessons?

(self- explanatory)

to be fair: under a bridge, not on a front yard

"danger."

texans, apparently, know their history well enough for what really matters...

what do you notice about the flags in this picture...? (subtlety says a lot.)

but do notice position. texans are not rebels any more.

just doubly patriotic.

hmmmm.

looks like the fellas been up to some social capitalizing

... or what?

view from outside a masonic lodge; sunset

neither me nor mine (but my kin she is!)

'cause we're a barbaric breed

(ibid)

...but we like pretty things!

ah, my $185 visit to the Compound(names withheld to protect identity.)

Wisdom 101

2009-01-20T16:24:00.006-06:00

thought one: on the lessons of exile and getting what we asked for

Israel learned from Babylon.

We might miss that, as so much of the OT is full of the chosen people's treachery and "asking-for-it" behavior. Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezequiel are big books. They promise a lot, but all the good stuff is pretty much future happenings. We forget: Daniel read Jeremiah. He repented. He was not alone. The men in Ezra listened. John the Baptist, son of a priest, honored Malachi's rebuke. The stench of the river Chebar stuck a long while in Hebrew nostrils. The very reason Jesus had Pharisees to wrangle with was because Israel wanted to do whatever it took never to get their happy tails back in captivity again. Even strain a gnat and tithe mint, anise, and cummin. Whatever it took.

Likewise, people learn from pain. Thusly, does corporal punishment work. Sometimes hearts change; frequently behavior does. We'd like to hope everyone would search history and peruse the arguments to come to a logical conclusion about life, but a lot prefer the hands-on method of experience to teach them. Disillusionment is not a bad thing; it's the death of illusion.

Welcome to four years of streaming video/audio lessons in government, economics, psychology, and sociology.

(Wisdom 101)

This is what we asked for. don't tell me you didn't vote for Obama; you didn't convince enough of the population not to, either. Your beliefs were not convincing. Or my beliefs, as it were. "Our side" wasn't impressive enough, credible enough, acceptable, authentic, believeable, cogent, conclusive, dependable, faithful, hopeful, incontrovertible, likely, moving, plausible, possible, powerful, presumable, probable, rational, reasonable, reliable, satisfactory, satisfying, solid, sound, swaying, telling, trustworthy, trusty, valid ...

enough. or if it was, we kept it too much so on the down low.

i couldn't get enough young, black, female, or Latino voters to believe the life of the helpless trumps all other "issues". Conservatives couldn't figure out how to explain why big government is death... to anyone beside themselves. A majority of voting Americans think a charming, gracious President and lots of generous programs will fix their problems. Obviously, grace and charm are appealling. Conservatives were right; why would they need graciousness?

Well, here's the good thing: if we follow t r u t h more than we adhere to any label/ ideology, reality is always on our side. Eventually, people will find out their lives and the world continue about as stinkedly the same as usual. Maybe it will get worse. Some conservative "points" might be proved. Should conservatives therefore console themselves by gloating like 3rd graders?

Admittedly, we might sigh like Paul at the soon-sinking of our ship, we might not be able to hold back a small "i told you so" to the gnarly sailors around us, but we don't have to be scorners on the Titanic. There can be an alternative. This is a time to be pessamistic, not hopeless. Do not think short term. Do not enjoy the destruction of illusionment. Sympathize practically. Offer plan B. We can let history prove our points for us, step forward, (maybe after some etiquette lessons) and offer an alternative. How?

1) Identify the problems. (Most people seem to have this one down pat. But try to zero in on the heart of the problem. if problems have hearts.)

2) Ask, "Which problems are most pressing to me? Which can I DO something about?"

3) Study history. Seek wisdom. Converse. (*Note: when i say, "converse," i mean, like, "dialogue." abstain from the party line. keep your complaining to the bare necessary. answer each of your own complaints with #4...)

4) Plan.

5) Study how to articulate plan, how to convince. Practice articulation and conviction.

6) Articulate and execute.

thought two: At least we don't have an ochlocracy.

och·loc·ra·cy: (n.) gov't by the masses; mob rule

thought three: frederica! read this delightfully anticonsumerist essay

".. over the generations the work people knew by hand has been replaced by the work of experts. Two centuries ago [or a few thousand kilometers away today] a mother was her family’s doctor, teacher, seamstress, cook, and storyteller. Today a mother *shops for* the best medical care, the best school, the best clothes, the best foods, the best entertainment video. She is no longer a producer, but merely an acquirer. Everything her family needs is produced by strangers and experts, whose abilities seem to far exceed her own. At the most she can make a decorative wall-hanging—from a kit designed by an expert."

"Advertising would have us think that this role of mere selector is
a luxurious one, and that we should go ahead and indulge ourselves (and in the
process keep spewing money). But from inside the amoeba it feels debilitating.
No one wants to be a mere taker. Such qualities as initiative, creativity, originality, and courage are necessary for a person to feel that their life has meaning -- that they are truly alive. And since nobody has yet figured out how to make you pay for doing those things, these qualities are not much emphasized."

"How to break free?
Well, we can shake up our perspective and avoid hypnosis by staying alert to the transience of all this, and staying aware of how long and varied human history has been. We can resist creeping intoxication by keeping one foot in eternity, in prayer. We can take practical steps: study the cultures of previous generations, develop forgotten hand-skills, read older books, even watch older movies. The simple act of shopping second-hand is a kind of consumer’s pocket veto. We should also cultivate amused skepticism about advertising, and teach this wariness to our kids, just as a previous generation taught kids to watch out for snakes. "

and send them to 3rd world countries early & often. make sure some of the happiest and best company they know are at a lower income range than you are. let them give to the needy and see how far their alms go. and convince them they are absolutely the most fortunate kids in the entire world: one for their material prosperity, and two because they could live without most of it and not lose much. make sure they understand: there are always those poorer, not necessarily more miserable, and there are always those richer, although probably not happier or better souled. and give them heroes. real heroes. people with backbone. whether it's Davy Crockett or the kid's grandmother, nothing shows the emptiness of image-obsession like unself-conscious substance.

Babylon blasters: because music with the B-word is just more refreshing somehow

Rivers of Babylon

To the King

(no, i don't speak portuguese. yet. but that is a good question.)

Part One: The Wayside

2009-01-08T16:34:00.011-06:00

The Parable of the Sower (Mark 4: 3-20)

introduction:

God's word is never deficient: if the heathen preach it, if hypocrites quote it, if we ignorant cling to it, it can still be profitable for all things, provided... the Holy Spirit ministers it. The profit is in the interaction between the Holy Spirit-as-word-carrier and the recipient's heart/mind/soul.

Of course, an un-Spirit-controlled preacher is just poking around in the dark with his presentation of Scripture and his speech on what it all should mean to us. He cannot depend on any sort of supernatural happening. He preaches with his own natural [fleshly] interpretation/ application and his trust is in man's wisdom and will power. Only God's stubborn assertion to be glorified- to cover the earth with knowledge of Himself as water the sea- does anything.

But what about the hearer? What's my obligation? How not to be a hearer only, but a doer of the word? How to have fruit in yourself (some 100 fold) from the seed of God? And, ever so urgently, how to work the soil in the little ones for the Holy Spirit's cultivation?

******************************************************

Part One: The Wayside

"Some seed fell on the wayside;
and the birds of the air came and devoured it."

What, praytell, is a wayside? It's soil not for walking on or planting. It's just there. The fringes, the edge, the outside of usefulness. No one cares for it, watches over it, esteems it arable land. The seeds falls by chance. It is not planted. There's no cautious famer or even a scarecrow watching over it, scaring off predators. This soil- I mean, soul- is neglected and being nothing stronger than dust, is defenseless. Anyone, from crows to possums to coyotes to the enemy of our souls, has free run.

No one expects this land, this soul, to do much of anything, let alone bear fruits worthy of repentance. No one eagerly searches for the first hint of green to push through its dark cover. No one thinks of this person in spiritual terms at all. No one waters their soul with their tears. No one loses sleep to hold vigil over it. The soul is not precious; no one sees possibilities. This soul is not worthy of our attention, let alone our care.

If they receive the word, it's accidental. These souls are the birds' domain; small wonder scavengers eat the word, when they have eaten everything else they can find. You see, scavengers do pay attention to the wayside. A small scarecrow might have been enough. Passersby, waving their hands every now and then and raising their voice a bit might have changed the whole course of this parable. A hopeful, slightly ridiculous farmer seeing possibility where others see only a gutter might have found a great increase in his crop- more arable land than he had previously calculated! Scripture never says there was anything wrong with the soil... except that it was by the wayside. The bird just happened to get to it before any quixotic farmer could.

Souls like so... resides in maybe the majority of our nation's teenagers. The public school system tries to make sure they're educated little neglected souls, but that's generally going by a very loose definition of "educated" and a very clueless definition of "soul." Whole ghettos are filled with them. They're not totally ignored; they are a huge market and voting block. When sellers or politicians need them, they send an custom-made ad their way, individualized to their age group and social preferences. Whole countries are inhabited by them. They're not totally inconsequential; wars start because of them; building blow up because of them. Demons have plenty of use for worthless souls. The wayside... so ignorable! All over the place, as common as electric poles you don't even see anymore.

Moving this discussion a little closer to us than the ghetto or Gaza... the birds likewise consume the word from our children's undefended souls. [And by "our," i mean, "the blessed Church's."] And what can happen to the little ones can happen to us when careless as well.

But when? When no one provides a comeback for the lies Satan whispers (and sometimes screams), that's when. When the Deceiver is allowed an uninterrupted monologue, any sacred word that might have previously dropped gets eaten like it's hot. Deceptions can be conveniently downloaded by unchaperoned fingers for ¢99 a lie from amazon. (That is, unless the devil is being competative and provides the little ones with more than one lie per song.) "On" buttons can deliver a steady stream of word-eating words until unconciousness drowns them out. Once that's done and the kid is out, the devil can play through the subconscious with all the birds he's let in during the day. So very many words and pretty pictures in glossy magazines and phosphorescent screens can gobble the relevance of the only Word and only Image that can bring cold clay to life. All because there was no scarecrow! There was no expectation! There was no care!

The wayside is when Satan is given permission, opportunity, a platform on which to speak, and he is presented with no rebuttal. The wayside: realities containing no plausability structure wherein Satan can be crushed underfoot and the word flourish. Those birds? Atheism with no Church pointing out the hand of God. Beckoning hedonists with no happy monks around talking about a laudable exchange. A world of "me, myself, and i" with no tangible rebuttal of love.A flickering pseudoworld where no Kingdom of Light seems realistic. Ads promising contentment only a swipe away with no joyful, plastic-less mendicants to grin and demur. A small, sneering voice inside, "No one can jump that high," when there's no one in sight whose feet ever even leave the ground...

... the word is taken away, vaporizes, disintigrates as something impossible, laughable, idealistic, boring, for others, for another world... not for you. We like to hope that "someday" the word will bear fruit on the wayside... but how can it, if it has been consumed with little probability of "accidental" sowing again?

No... nothing besides weeds will ever grow on the wayside . On other soils, yes, we can hope. In the world of edit undo and abnormal farmers, maybe. But as is, the wayside is forever barren. It could have been something great. It could have made a tree so big that birds of the aire came to nest in its shade. But the wayside was ignored, and the seed disappeared, and now the wayside has no hope. I guess the greatest consolation i can offer is at least we aren't the wayside, right... at least no beast's going to eat the word out of our souls, hopefully. Out of our friends', maybe. Out of our nation's, probably. Out of our babies', may God forbid. But out of our souls... no, of course not...

***********************************************

hebrews 2:1-4

Middle of the Week blues, consoled by G. Field and thought-provoked by el Turi

2009-01-08T07:45:00.006-06:00

thought one:

thought two: emotions, taken apart and lying on a dissection plate

once upon a time, i had a prof whose wife was in the psych business. maybe it was in an education class, maybe we were talking about kids acting out. or maybe it was in philosophy. i don't remember. anyhow, i do remember this: he said she said depression is almost always related to anger.

last night, in a too-fleeting conversation with el Turi, we were talking about virtues and the role community plays in their inculcation and appreciation. he said, isn't it funny how responsibility and mental stability go hand-in-hand? how tranquil people are disciplined? how people who give themselves what they want often make themselves and those around them miserable?

very interesting.

thought three:

depression/ melancholy/ moodiness is...

ungrateful,

unworshipful,

self-centered,

and

short-sighted.

which doesn't make me feel any better.

[oh, but this was too much info! i apologize. it's just for a record, understand.]

what is the difference between salvation and gratitude?

2008-12-31T17:02:00.010-06:00

thought one: learning to count days

time ticks off like a bomb before “good-bye.” With how many people do I have the gift of time? How many people can I call up to get their opinion, shoot them an email to say “hello,” invade their house for coffee, peanut butter, and apples, or meet them on the South Side for sublime Vietnamese?

God, so often hated for taking away “our” time, has given us time. Right now. Feliz Navidad: you have time. Happy Birthday: you’re not dead yet. Happy New Year: you have days available to be numbered. Right now, with individuals x, y, and z. They’re still around! Rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory.

Now, if we leave our gift in the wrapping paper, sitting on the floor while we go off and “dream solitude liberty” until the present rots away, tissue paper and all, whose fault is that? A sad, solitary past is over. The future may not even ever come. But a rotted present, all alone… is nobody’s fault but my own.

That’s the whole point of books like A Christmas Carol, Revelation, or Joel… even This Present Age. We still have time. Loaned (prestado/ borrowed/ rented) it is, but we can still place our hot little hands around it and use the blessed creature. My western civ professor (may his wisdom ever grow and his humor never cease) started his course one semester admonishing us to “see the end from the beginning.” We believe history is going somewhere. What about this day? This life? This networking? This technology?

thought two: Thanksgiving, fashionably late

Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's and all the rest make me pause and think of all i have to thankful for...

(but i already knew all that. i do have five working senses, a half-awake heart, and an occasionally processessing mind.)

it's not a question of objects of gratitude or reasons for thanks. more than anything, times like these show me how grateful i am not. these precious sons of Zion all around, and i act like they're mere mortals. cool, fun, great company... but there's no "selah" between those descriptors.

let us try to pause, here at the death of 2008 and offer an obituary with thought and commas and adjectives and abstract nouns.

i am surrounded by persons who... are filled with the living God. in a world of emptiness, i count my nearest and dearest those so full of the Christ that they share.

selah.

people who make me laugh until my stomach hurts.

selah.

hug me because they are glad i exist. in a world of isolation, people hug me?! in a society of sneering cynics, children tell me they love me?!

selah.

people serve me. me! whose character would be better off serving. they, whose character deserves a solid eternity of rest and relaxation, serve... me?!

(what madness.)

selah.

Family on two continents who accept me, break bread with me, share their life with me, invite me into their hopes, struggles, victories... me! who was once an alien and stranger from the household of God... at home.

selah.

Reyna and Mari... mis hijas. whose "relationship" (phhhhwww. [insert rude noise] koinonia, communion, sharing, intwined life) with me i cannot even articulate.

...who respect me, yet don't allow me to take myself too seriously.
...who laugh at me and make me join in.
...who teach me- them all quiet and serving, grumpy and complaining, serious and compassionate, angry for justice... what company son mis hijas!

selah.

people who respond to God and others as if the Bible really were on to something. who live as if Christ truly conquered a consuming, dark, victorious, unconquerably death. who speak of God the way He should be spoken of: with fear and trembling, wonder, rejoicing, emotion, reason, exhuberance, beauty, allegory, preaching, poetry, essay, book, and life... as if God were really real.

selah.

and Thou, Christ. who invented all this. who love the Father the way He should be loved. who give Him perfect delight when the rest of the world neither sees Him nor looks for Him, neither understands Him nor wants to. You, whose life and death were so overwhelming (so much!) that you could make the blind see God, the lost look for Him, the senseless understand Him, the dead want Him.

You!

Who love beauty and continuously offer it to us. Who brush up near us, so if, by some way, some chance, we, grasping for everything, might lay hold of You, the only Thing. and You, catching our clutching fingers, are only too glad to carry us, clinging, into Your Father's house, already prepared for the likes of us. You, who not content with Your own perfection, desire to perfect the incorrigible. You, who unsatisfied with Your own fullness, desire to fill the empty with good things till their cup overflows, the oil drips down, and no word comes forth from their full mouth but Alelluja. You, who will do so, simply because You will to do so, regardless of recalcitrant servants, fists full of dust.

You... whose kindnesses break our best and loneliest attempts at self-sufficiency. You, whose Word brings fire to our utterly inflamable soul. You, who make the frozen to burn. You, who consuming, consume not us, because Your compassions fail not. For the listless consumers ever wanting the new and improved, Your mercies are new every morning, and we are ashamed into thanks.

selah.

You, who might take our life and those things that can't remain to give us.. an everlasting Kingdom, an unshakable home, and a body fit for Your company, even after all matter has been emphatically and irrevocably destroyed. hope of Resurrection! hope that we shall be changed!

selah.

You, who give... Yourself.
when we're swollen by what we know or deflated because of all we don't: Yourself.
when we're hateful and catty or broken and hurt: Yourself.
when we follow the lost or mislead the seeking: Yourself.
when we disregard the truth or misspeak Your merits: Yourself.
when we "love our own selves," but the parts we ought not, when we we hate our own selves, ignoring the Alternative: You still give Yourself.

when we have sinned and done wrongly, beastly, abominably, or have sinned and done nothing, loved nothing, given nothing...

Yet You are there.
We are not alone.
in a universe of beauty, good, love, images of God,
filth, evil, hate, and reflections of hell...
You are here.
You are Emmanuel.
We are not alone.
We are not condemned to ourselves.
You are here.
Emmanuel.

selah.

Blessed be the Uncynical God!

2008-12-27T19:43:00.005-06:00

Thought one: last carol allusions (of 2008 at least. i think. probably.)

Christmas is God’s yearly anti-cynicism inoculation for our chronically- sardonic world. Go ahead: defer it. Be miserable sick the rest of the year. Sneer at the gloomy clouds of night. Make dark jokes about how death’s dark shadows aren’t afraid of you. Shrug yourself to death in the midst of envy, strife, and quarrels. Make choices; you have no future. Be brave; you have no hope. Be wry; you have no joy. Be resigned; you have no peace. “Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something."

You can… even in March, August, October… any cynical day of your wretched year. (Assuming you have breath left, I mean.) Say something pathetic. Say something noble. Quote if you must:

“Blessed is He that comes in the Name of the Lord…
Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner…
I do believe; help Thou my unbelief!”

And see how fast, how happily, how lovingly Emmanuel shall come to thee, miserable rebel, ornery sinner, and generally faithless one!

Thought two: a brother says it much better than I can: B. Davenport- prologue to The Bravehearted Gospel by E. Ludy. Remind me to rave later.

“What was Jesus like? After all, if He is the historic example of every-thing that we are to be at this very moment in time, then what was He
like?…

Most of us have heard that God is love, that God became flesh,
and that Jesus was His name…

Jesus was perfect, and He lived the only perfect life that’s ever been lived. [But what does that mean?] It means that in all things, and at all times, Jesus was perfectly loving, perfectly unselfish, and perfectly humble. He was perfectly righteous, and perfectly holy. … blameless.

Not once in His life was He ever arrogant, boastful, or proud. The number of times that Jesus spoke an unkind word or mindlessly lashed out with His tongue came to a grand total of zero. He had no blind
spots. His doctrine was pure. He never erred in His teaching by placing an over- or underemphasis on any doctrine. He never spoke out of prejudice, mere opinion, or dogma.

He transcended His culture.
He spoke only what His Father game Him to speak, and His words were the words of God. He came to serve others, not to be served Himself. He made no attempt to manipulate the masses for His own gain, but lived humbly and without pretension.
He was approachable. Women, children, tax collectors, prostitutes, and even lepers came to Jesus and were never turned away. He taught that we should love one another, that we should treat others as we ourselves would like to be treated, and that we should do good even to those who use and mistreat us.”

Because He did. He preached what He had lived.

Thought three:

“Love is patient; love is kind…” Jesus was.. Jesus was… [Jesus is... Jesus is...]

“Love always trusts.” We have no first person narrative regarding Christ. Quotes, sermons; no writings. He could have. It would have helped, maybe, to have Someone omniscient write His view of the necessary Scriptures for 2000+ years of faith.

Could have included a special message to the Arians, Gnostics, and subsequent heretics, and systematically, unequivocally defined and explained all those sticky issues like a human/divine nature, the Trinity, acceptable analogies thereof, salvation and all it entails, sanctification, hierarchial outline of Church, identity of Mary, exhaustive analysis of baptism, tongues, the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, the 2nd coming (time, identity of anti-Christ, meaning of Old Testament symbolism), the Sacraments, liturgy, et cetera.

Oh, but wait: Someone omniscient did write His view of the necessary Scriptures for 2000+ years of faith… just not in first person. (and without my advice!) He didn’t wrack Himself with worry that the subsequent generations get the EXACT view of life and liberty and pursuit of the Kingdom that only His syntax could provide.

Because, you see, love always trusts.

And as His Father trusted a pious Jewish virgin to love, care for, and sacrifice herself for the life of the Word, so did Christ trust His followers to do the same for the life of the Word, the Faith, the Body. Nothing so ignorable as a quiet child, except maybe the still, small voice of God in the midst of cacophony. Yet God chose the Child, and Christ the still, small voice of God and clay pots...

Whoa. He trusts people, not books. A Church in so many illiterate ages. Disciples, martyrs, the faithful among the masses. Sheep among wolves. Human beings in so many over stimulated, over-machinated, over-informed circles.

He trusted a few to transcribe the essentials. He trusted a few more to provide a tradition of interpretation. He trusts us all to be living epistles, known and read by all men.

He trusted a few to oppose the religious status quo, most to submit to it. He trusted a few to blaze new trails of faith, most to continue in trails long blazed. He trusted a few to lead, most to follow.

God trusts us. God trusts us. God trusts us?! Even though He knows us…? Maybe, mejor dicho, God trusts His Spirit, so powerful, so trustworthy, so triumphant, Death and Hades cannot foil Him. Broken, repentant humanity… that’s not His worry; that’s His masterpiece.

thought four: hope that does not disappoint...

Paul: “being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ…”

And then goes on to say, consequently,

“and this I pray that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment, that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ, being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ to the glory and praise of God.”

Funny, how that “confidence,” that trust, is for us but in God… and how trust like that leads to several verses of fervent, effectual, spot on prayer. [think: The Lord’s Prayer… all about trust.]

Maybe that’s why Christ prayed so much on earth and intercedes so much now- and the Spirit groans- because They TRUST so much… after investing so much, They must trust so much… in the only One worthy.

Don’t leave the Spirit to trust, to invest, to pray, to intercede, to groan alone. Care. Trust. Hope. Invest. Sell all you have and give alms. Pray. Bet all on Christ’s Body, risen gloriously 2000 years back, rising victorious today, and to rise in a big way someday soon, not too far away…