"A Formidable List of Attainments for a Child of Six"

Looks like I have my list of New Year's resolutions. At least I know how to add and subtract numbers to 10 WITHOUT counters.  

https://www.amblesideonline.org/art-attainments

A reprint of a curriculum outline from a Charlotte Mason school in the 1890's.

1. To recite, beautifully, 6 easy poems and hymns
2. to recite, perfectly and beautifully, a parable and a psalm
3. to add and subtract numbers up to 10, with dominoes or counters
4. to read--what and how much, will depend on what we are told of the child
5. to copy in print-hand from a book
6. to know the points of the compass with relation to their own home, where the sun rises and sets, and the way the wind blows
7. to describe the boundaries of their own home
8. to describe any lake, river, pond, island etc. within easy reach
9. to tell quite accurately (however shortly) 3 stories from Bible history, 3 from early English, and 3 from early Roman history (my note here, we may want to substitute early American for early English!)
10. to be able to describe 3 walks and 3 views
11. to mount in a scrap book a dozen common wildflowers, with leaves (one every week); to name these, describe them in their own words, and say where they found them.
12. to do the same with leaves and flowers of 6 forest trees
13. to know 6 birds by song, colour and shape
14. to send in certain Kindergarten or other handiwork, as directed
15. to tell three stories about their own "pets"--rabbit, dog or cat.
16. to name 20 common objects in French, and say a dozen little sentences
17. to sing one hymn, one French song, and one English song
18. to keep a caterpillar and tell the life-story of a butterfly from his own observations.

---

What a Child Should Know at Twelve, from the appendix at the back of School Education, Volume 3 of her series.

The six years' work--from six to twelve--which I suggest, should and does result in the power of the pupils--

(a) To grasp the sense of a passage of some length at a single reading: and to narrate the substance of what they have read or heard.
(b) To spell, and express themselves in writing with ease and fair correctness.
(c) To give an orderly and detailed account of any subject they have studied.
(d) To describe in writing what they have seen, or heard from the newspapers.
(e) They should have a familiar acquaintance with the common objects of the country, with power to reproduce some of these in brushwork.
(f) Should have skill in various handicrafts, as cardboard Sloyd, basket-making, clay-modelling, etc.
(g) In Arithmetic, they should have some knowledge of vulgar and decimal fractions, percentage, household accounts, etc.
(h) Should have a knowledge of Elementary Algebra, and should have done practical exercises in Geometry.
(i) Of Elementary Latin Grammar; should read fables and easy tales, and, say, one or two books of 'Caesar.'
(j) They should have some power of understanding spoken French, and be able to speak a little; and to read an easy French book without a dictionary.
(k) In German, much the same as in French, but less progress.
(l) In History, they will have gone through a rather detailed study of English, French, and Classical (Plutarch) History.
(m) In Geography they will have studied in detail the map of the world, and have been at one time able to fill in the landscape, industries, etc., from their studies, of each division of the map.
(n) They will have learned the elements of Physical Geography, Botany, Human Physiology, and Natural History, and will have read interesting books on some of these subjects.
(o) They should have some knowledge of English Grammar.
(p) They should have a considerable knowledge of Scripture History and the Bible text.
(q) They should have learned a good deal of Scripture and of Poetry, and should have read some Literature.
(r) They should have learned to sing on the Tonic Sol-fa method, and should know a number of English, French, and German Songs.
(s) They should have learned Swedish Drill and various drills and calisthenic exercises.
(t) In Drawing they should be able to represent common objects of the house and field with brush or charcoal; should be able to give rudimentary expression to ideas; and should be acquainted with the works of some artists through reproductions.
(u) In Music their knowledge of theory and their ear-training should keep pace with their powers of execution.

 "The suppression of comment was always difficult for him and the movement of his facial muscles was an outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual victory."

-Elizabeth Goudge, The Scent of Water

Answering Myself

Long I've struggled with 1) self-denial v. enjoying the good life; 2) the necessity faith in the supernatural when it just doesn't seem real; 3) the fear that behind everything is nothing; 4) creeping neuroticism/ darkness. 

I don't have the answers, but I do have thoughts after a doozy of a year. Seems like "return to first principles" is actually really sound. 

WHAT I WOULD SAY TO MYSELF 

1) The center? key? is to accept that God is God and we are creature. To be able to see the good around us as freely given, not deserved, is light in the midst of darkness, joy, a really good sign. However, our self-centered heart will take the good, not as granted even, but as nothing. Our due. Inevitable. Bare minimum, and not even sufficient. When we are the center, ingratitude is the rule, and envy, covetousness, greed, and every evil thing follow, trying to satisfy ourselves as God. We have the appetite of the abyss. We have something, but not what we want? "It is right for me to be angry, even unto death." To be able to perceive good is a gift (grace!) from God. The first step to recovery is gratitude. But I can't even make myself feel grateful! Maybe the first step is to recognize the disease. Agree with God that we are sick, bad, mean, and full of darkness. "Wretched man that I am! Who will save me from this body of sin?" 

Then, maybe we can appreciate some light. Then, maybe the humility that any good doesn't have to be. God would still be a Creator of good if He took it all away from me, if I were destroyed. I have no rights, only privileges. We die so quickly. That is either because we are meaningless matter, our selfishness the obvious mechanism of animalistic will to survive, or because meaning comes from God, giving life to dust, and our selfishness ignores Him. We in our rebellion can choose meaninglessness, which is unlivable, or to imagine ourselves the creators of meaning, which is illusion. (So good, the image of our center + our desires as spokes on a wheel. The more we place ourselves at the center, the more susceptible we are to "logismoi," demonic insinuation and manipulation pushing us further along the spokes of lust, greed, hate. "We know they are demonic because they are universal.") 

2) Suffering helps to clarify. But it's not in and of itself a good thing. It's suffering! But if it can be used for good, for humility, for teachability, for recognizing that happiness is fleeting, that God is God, and we die very quickly, then even suffering can be blessed. But it needs the intervention of God to redeem it, or it's suffering in a world of nothingness. Our choice is to look towards God. To find what He says that we can "amen."

[I'd add: When things are dark, little goodness is highlighted. Kindness in hard times can keep you going. So meaningful.]

3) Can't "believe"? Hope and truth are good starting place for faith. (The whole truth- seeing the good as well as the evil.) One can pray for faith. One can pray for hope. God is the one who answers with light, or we perish. It is by grace we are saved through faith, not of ourselves, lest any man should boast. But don't hedge your bets. Build a life invested in the Resurrection. That "proves" it backwards and forwards, by any mercy of God possible. 

4) Self-denial: We've got a self inside as strong-willed, selfish, and unreasonable as a raw toddler. Toddlers ought not be loosed on the world, and certainly don't do a lot of good for anybody. And they at least are cute, small, and ignorant. Our internal toddler is overgrown, merciless, manipulative, brilliantly self-justifying, and unrelenting. Toddler metaphor aside, we are all capable of becoming narcissists, our feelings and desires real, with all others NPCs. God alone can fix that. He can take us by our shoulders and shake us, "Do you see this woman?!" He can teach love and self-forgetfulness where there was only self love and self-centered hate before. In the flesh nothing good dwells. On the road to life, we have to die to the self's supremacy, or self will kill the fruit of the Spirit and impede the work of God. It (self as center) is poison to all relationships, to every good work. To be carnally minded is death, but to be spirituality-minded is life and peace. 

I praise God through Jesus Christ Our Lord- through whom we have received the reconciliation. God loves us- body + soul union (hence the Incarnation) and cares for our needs. He just doesn't find them the center of His universe. WE are the secondary characters; He is the protagonist. And when we accept a world "not vague, not lonely, not governed by me only," we can find treasure hid in a field: joy, contentment, gratitude, discipline, fruit. 

5) Gifts are good and to be received. But a life of grasping is a bad way to live. We will never be satisfied. The happiness will be more elusive. Our standards and complaints will grow steeper and steeper- the law of diminishing returns and the book of Ecclesiastes. All it takes for me to be happy is for everything to go right always. Or, we can learn to be content. Dear God, what a gift, contentment.

6) Ultimate truth and certainty are the Lord's, the Omniscient. Ours is to seek his grace, his mercy, his intervention. Who knows if the Lord will turn and leave a blessing?

I'm just a negative person.

And my negativity, because it's "authentic" - "analytical", "honest", and critical- yup, that's you alright. But the worst you. Dark and rancid, twisted, sometimes toxic. The "you" Scripture calls the sinful nature, damned and devilish. The "you" the devils can relate to, easy target, soon persuaded to do the will of the evil one. Authentic, though.

But what about humility as authenticity? Authentic perspective that can pause long enough to play the "at least" game, my new favorite. 

"At least the birds still sing." 

"At least there's coffee." 

"At least my village hasn't been raided and my family murdered." 

Yes, there will be times the darkness is so dark you can't play any games at all. Then, you should probably go to sleep. 

But when you awake, try to find some reality that doesn't skew dark, whining, grating, condemning, lacking. Get more data to be about and stop justifying your myopia. Proud darkness may be real, but it's not all that is. 

Who's fault?

 Blaming one of the most dangerous thought patterns, because... You're right. But that's all you are. You're not productive, or redemptive, or problem-solving, or forgiving, or fruitful. All you are is right. And what is that worth? Who are you talking to? The whole world in every moment of non-productivity? Are you going to make a a sign so you don't have to repeat yourself, or just keep repeating yourself, whether anyone is listening or not? That is an option. And when you are old (starting now), that will be the easiest story to tell- sad and full of injustice. What a story to tell. 

 God, the great 3rd person omniscient, reliable narrator, a littlemore objective than we're comfortable with- rightly weighing each heartless burden thrust upon us, noting already each injustice we've been dealt and passed on, and esteeming each cup of water given... "Pour out your hearts before Him, all ye peoples For He is a refuge for us." Which is not to say a sympathetic ear who nods with empathy. He is not "that friend". 

 But instead the one who may tell you to go the extra mile to see the glory of God, or give you an idea how to bless your persecutor, or give you bread to feed your enemy as the quickest way to pour coals on his head. You will not, probably, come up with these "solutions" yourself, because they may not solve your definition of The Problem. But you may find that going your way, you are healed of the disease you didn't even notice anymore. Or learn a lesson you never wanted to learn, becoming a person you never would have chosen to become, understanding God and humanity in a way you never thought necessary. But not a bitter, demented radio of wrongs and needs. You won't become that.

"Peace Through Strength requires — unsurprisingly — actual strength."

https://www.theflipside.io/archives/yemen-2

(Of course, I read most foreign policy through the lens of child training... it is more relevant that way...)

"Any use of force carries the risk of escalation, but [they] started this exchange, and the failure [...] to respond for weeks has produced its own escalation."

"a series of geopolitically unsuccessful, inconsequential, mostly reactive unilateral actions, with no end game. Underlying it all is the sense that no one is particularly frightened, respectful, or even wary of [our] power anymore."

And, from a libertarian:

“None of these fights have any mandate from the American people."

Where does true authority come from?

In Fine Form

J. Peterson- How to Raise Kids You Actually Like

On Sanity

"... a man's reason is his servant and not his master; that there's no notion a man chooses to receive which his reason will not justify, whether it be mistrust of his neighbor, jealousy of his wife, doubts about his religion, or contempt for his country. 

The only safeguard against fallacies which undermine the strength of the nation morally and economically is a liberal education which affords a wide field for reflection in comparison and abundant data upon which to found sound judgments."

-Charlotte Mason 

“One convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.”

Thought 1: On opinions

"Free speech is the cornerstone of our democracy, and free speech by definition requires protecting unpopular ideas. Since bad ideas are often unpopular, this will include protecting some bad ones — fighting them with good ideas, rather than threats… The world is not neatly divided into good people who deserve protection and irredeemably bad people who deserve anything they get; it is full of complicated, flawed human beings who can often be better..."

Thought 2: On bad actors
How do you respond to people who will not respect others until it hurts them not to?

...not nicely.

Thought 3:

How does thought 2 square with the teachings of Jesus to turn the other cheek?

Thinking about the concept of authority includes force (painful force) for the good. "ruling with a rod of iron"

Where do we have the authority to use force (in words, deeds), even when it hurts others? Can harshness be loving in the big picture?

Or is calm, measured response not the whole of "turning the other cheek", and there should be more aggressive, honest, confrontational love?.

Acedia

"Anecdotally, in Tsarist Russia, if a wealthy noble woman came down with long-term depression (which can overlap with acedia)allegedly a trusted antidote was to put her in an old peasant woman's house and make her do many of the basic household duties such as fetching the water, sweeping the floor, chopping wood etc. Basic manual tasks were also considered vital to keep spirits up in the Desert Father tradition of early Christian monasticism."

- wiki, on acedia
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acedia

ref: (it's not about the gay part!)
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/unequallyyoked/2014/11/it-is-not-good-for-man-to-be-alone-a-review-of-gay-and-catholic.html

http://www.hermitary.com/solitude/acedia.html 
It is also good to recall what Abba Moses, one of the most experienced of the fathers, told me. I had not been living long in the desert when I was troubled by listlessness [i.e., acedia]. So I went to him and said: Yesterday I was greatly troubled and weakened by listlessness, and I was not able to free myself from it until I went to see Abba Paul. Abba Moses replied to me by saying: So far from freeing yourself from it, you have surrendered to it completely and become its slave. You must realize that it will attack all the more severely because you have deserted your post, unless from now on you strive to subdue it through patience, prayer and manual labor.

... John Cassian went further than his conversation with Abba Moses to describe the physical symptoms so literally, even to the hour of the day when they peak, that acedia became known as the "noonday devil." He provides an excellent description of the psychology of acedia as well, indicating that acedia is a "tedium or perturbation of heart ... akin to dejection and especially felt by wandering monks and solitaries, a persistent and obnoxious enemy to such as dwell in the desert." He goes on:

When this [acedia] besieges the unhappy mind, it begets aversion from the place, boredom with one's cell, and scorn and contempt for one's brethren, whether they be dwelling with one or some way off, as careless and unspiritual-minded persons.

The listlessness of acedia is akin to a feeling of inertness, John Cassian notes, producing no spiritual fruit, a sense of any practice being "empty of spiritual profit." John's remedy, following desert tradition, is a level of sustained activity approximating rigorous physical labor and what were to be called works of mercy, which fend off cynicisms.

Will + Reason + First Ideas for Kids

"15.The way of the will:
Children should be taught, (a) to distinguish between ‘I want’ and ‘I will.’ (b) That the way to will effectively is to turn our thoughts from that which we desire but do not will. (c) That the best way to turn our thoughts is to think of or do some quite different thing, entertaining or interesting. (d) That after a little rest in this way, the will returns to its work with new vigour. (This adjunct of the will is familiar to us as diversion, whose office it is to ease us for a time from will effort, that we may ‘will’ again with added power.

16. The Way of the Reason.––
We should teach children, too, not to ‘lean’ (too confidently) ‘unto their own understanding,’ because of the function of reason is, to give logical demonstration (a) of mathematical truth; and (b) of an initial idea, accepted by the will. In the former case reason is, perhaps, an infallible guide, but in the second it is not always a safe one, for whether that initial idea be right or wrong, reason will confirm it by irrefragable proofs.

17. Therefore children should be taught, as they become mature enough to understand such teaching that the chief responsibility which rests on them as persons is the acceptance or rejection of initial ideas. To help them in this choice we should give them principles of conduct and a wide range of the knowledge fitted for them. These three principles (15, 16 and 17) should save children from some of the loose thinking and heedless action which cause most of us to live at a lower level than we need."

-Charlotte Mason, Toward a Philosophy of Education

"What time I am [disillusioned], I put my trust in You."