18 febrero 2012

true things

...in a wicked, wondrous, wearisome world.

- the Psalms
- the BCP
- my sister-in-law's prayers
- hugs and pictures from the kids
- when a child grabs your hand
- my mom
- tree flowers; wild flowers; nurtured flowers
- the right music at the right moment
- Lewis
- grace abounding to the chief of sinners
- unintentional funniness
- honesty that is not advantageous
- sunrise
- dew
- the first bird singing at 6:35 a.m.
- God
- beauty made for audiences of 5 or less
- the end of a day when the only thing left to do is get in bed and sleep. (this God gives to all...)
- holy martyrs who die for the tenacious love of God
- holy witnesses who suffer, having done no wrong
- mothers, often
- people who do hard, dreary things for love of family
- the moon when you can really see it
- food when you're hungry
- when kids work hard
- becoming warm when you're cold
- becoming clean when you're dirty
- waking up with hope
- spending all you've got and doing what you were supposed to do
- an orderly but welcoming place
- poor, virtuous people
- the Holy Spirit
- many, many hymns
- whistling, generally
- coffee in the morning
- rain

** these true things reflecting a subjective interpretation of dictionary.com's second through fourth definitions of "true"...

2. real; genuine; authentic: true gold; true feelings.
3. sincere; not deceitful: a true interest in someone's welfare.
4. firm in allegiance; loyal; faithful; steadfast

... and not merely definition one:
1. being in accordance with the actual state or conditions; conforming to reality or fact; not false: a true story.

... because the actual state or conditions are sometimes really, really obscene. deceitful, disloyal, unfaithful, shaking, not steadfast. a partial reality maybe, but not truth that's worth telling. i needed to remember the truth worth telling.

09 febrero 2012

Why It Matters

brings to mind words once told me: don't try to say something original. just try to say the truth the very best you can.

01 febrero 2012

2012 and time machines exist

the back arrow on your inbox can take years off your life.* ...and i don't mean numbers. i mean, i can subtract my career from my existence. un-student teach myself. erase college. time warp back to the shape of my high school soul.

it's freaky.

past relationships (how i hate that indispensable word...) become written in present tense. the creepy thing is... the reply button is still at the top of the screen. if you're not careful, you can, mind revved by the email, start composing a reply....

....7 years late.

what a weird world we live in.

* (I guess I should say, "The back arrow on my inbox can take years off my life," as my sister's anorexic inbox teaches me not everyone leaves their emails in their inbox indefinitely for their later self to exhume in some strange digital time capsule. some people archive, which i think would still have the same general emotional effect to it as an obese inbox. some delete near everything, and are practical, and never procrastinate, and never bring heavy backpacks on long trips, either. but my backpacks are always full, my inbox is huge, my habit of procrastination not totally kicked, and thusly do such blog entries occur.)

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