26 abril 2006

one blinkin' week

chambi- hombre and llama
Originally uploaded by larebe87.
"For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, [are called]:

But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;

And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, [yea], and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are:

That no flesh should glory in his presence." 1 Cor. 1:26-29

therein lies my life.

24 abril 2006

"Mankind is not primarily defined by sin." -J. Kranzusch

thought one:
cognitive dissonance:

"According to cognitive dissonance theory, there is a tendency for individuals to seek consistency among their cognitions (i.e., beliefs, opinions). When there is an inconsistency between attitudes or behaviors (dissonance), something must change to eliminate the dissonance. In the case of a discrepancy between attitudes and behavior, it is most likely that the attitude will change to accommodate the behavior.

Two factors affect the strength of the dissonance: the number of dissonant beliefs, and the importance attached to each belief. There are three ways to eliminate dissonance: (1) reduce the importance of the dissonant beliefs, (2) add more consonant beliefs that outweigh the dissonant beliefs, or (3) change the dissonant beliefs so that they are no longer inconsistent.

Dissonance occurs most often in situations where an individual must choose between two incompatible beliefs or actions. The greatest dissonance is created when the two alternatives are equally attractive...

Consider someone who buys an expensive car but discovers that it is not comfortable on long drives. Dissonance exists between their beliefs that they have bought a good car and that a good car should be comfortable. Dissonance could be eliminated by deciding that it does not matter since the car is mainly used for short trips (reducing the importance of the dissonant belief) or focusing on the cars strengths such as safety, appearance, handling (thereby adding more consonant beliefs). The dissonance could also be eliminated by getting rid of the car, but this behavior is a lot harder to achieve than changing beliefs. "

thought two: re: eros (uh-oh... thats never a good sign)

why "falling" in love? from what i have observed (being very observant about such things), it's far more, "letting love go," as in releasing a flood, or breaking down in tears, or belching, or some other uncouth thing. falling in love sounds so innocent, like "accidentally" stepping in a mud puddle. there's nothing accidental about it.

and opera is kinda sick. pretty sometimes, but sick.

thought three:
"Josephus, writing late in the 1st X A.D., say s that Cyrus read the prophecies about himself in Isaiah [45:1] and wished to fulfill them."

who ever said exegesis isn't fun?

musical though of the day: ('cause thinking in music is nice)

Everybody I know says they need just "one thing"
And what they really mean is that they need just one thing more
And everybody seems to think they've got it coming
Well I know that I don't deserve You
Still I want to love and serve You more and more
You're my one thing

Save me from those things that might distract me
Please take them away and purify my heart
I don't want to lose the eternal for the things that are passing
'Cause what will I have when the world is gone
If it isn't for the love that goes on and on

My one thing
You're my one thing
And the pure in heart shall see God
You're my one thing
You're my one thing
And the pure in heart shall see God

Who have I in Heaven but You Jesus
And what better could I hope to find down here on earth
I could cross the most distant reaches
Of this world but I'd just be wasting my time
'Cause I'm certain already I'm sure I'd find

[Repeat chorus]

Every night and every day
You hold on tight
Or you drift away
And you're left to live
With the choices you make
Oh Lord please give me the strength
To watch and work and love and sing and pray

Whom have I in heaven but You, Jesus...
and what better could i hope to find down here on earth...
[repeat verse 3]

R. Mullins, thank you.

18 abril 2006

"i wanted to become a painter. i became picasso" -Pablo Picasso

thought one: re: Montparnasse, the Parisian neighborhood where Rivera (et. al.) were encouraged in their genius-y pursuits

"Arguments were common, some fueled by intellect, others by alcohol, and if there were fights, and there often were, the police were never summoned. If you couldn't pay your bill, people such as La Rotonde's proprietor, Victor Libion, would often accept a drawing, holding it until the artist could pay. As such, there were times when the café's walls were littered with a collection of artworks, that today would make the curators of the world's greatest museums drool with envy."

ok, so that's nice. but could they cook like Amelia? hmmmm? did they have kids as cute as the sobrinos? i didn't think so. hmph. who needs paris when you've got a home (or three)?

thought two:
whose bright idea was it to have so much of ourselves invested in the immaterial electronic world? cause i'm really not feeling it right now.

stupid disappearing files. excuse me while i SCREAM. quietly. (so as not to disturb the other library patrons.)

thought three: (courtesy Madame Eliot)

"Paul['s] life did not represent a series of events in which we would say it was
"easy to trust." It was not easy. It was necessary. A life free from suffering would be a
life in which faith in God would be a mere frill. A human life, on the contrary, is one in which faith is a necessity. Only a fool tries to do without it."

musical thought of the day:
"dear heavenly Father, make a list and consider it done. (signed) Your humble servant....

is there anything that i can do for You (repeat) after all the things You've done for me, is there anything that i can do?...
is there anyone that i can be for You(repeat) after all the people You've been to me, is there anyone that i can be? ...
is there anywhere that i can go for You (repeat) after all the places You've been for me, is there anywhere that i can go? ...
is there anything that i can do for You (repeat...)"

somedays i feel a quarter put together and half falling apart

thought one:
I am content to be and have what in Thy heartI am meant to be and have.--(George MacDonald, Diary of an Old Soul)

thought two:
post-script and revision of yesterday's thought three:

happiness is good. what is not good is lacking a range and profundity of emotions. happiness, yes. sadness, yes. anger, yes. hate, yes. passion, yes.

all redeemed.

thought three:

"arise ye,
and depart;
for this is
your rest:

it shall DESTROY you,
even with a sore destruction."

~Micah 2:10~

thought from a link:
check this brother out...
Worship III: Stirring Up Godly Emotions with Music

17 abril 2006

"I don’t operate at the sub-atomic level."

thought one:

RESOLVED: from now on, i will at least ask transients their names.

affirm that personhood, don't deny it.

thought two:

might be off on this one, but perhaps... modern evangelicals have attributed to "the Sinner's Prayer" the significance in salvation that the early Church (per the epistles) placed on baptism.

~John's "baptism of repentance for the remission of sins"
~Rom. 6:4 "we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life."
~1 Pet 3:21 "...baptism doth also now save us (not the putting away of the filth of the flesh, but the answer of a good conscience toward God,) by the resurrection of Jesus Christ"

thought three:

i have noticed within myself a certain shallowness of emotion. basically, i see three modes: happy, mellow, and depressed. generally, i don't really get depressed as long as i'm busy. really, there's no logical reason for me NOT to be sighing in blissful contentment. and that kind of makes me stop for a second. because the Bible was not written for *happy* persons.

my very super-secure contentment renders much of Scripture irrelevant. i can appreciate the Prophets by extension, but it's been a long time since i've been able to identify with them. James, Peter, the Sermon on the Mount... i get pieces of them. verses, here and there. the happy ones about being saved and holy and "different" from the world. but my word, how much do i miss.

i wonder if i am supposed to be so happy. biomedical ethics talk of whether something should be done, just because it can be done. just because i was born into the land of the brave and free and pampered, does that mean that i have the right to walk around in bliss?

the human experience involves suffering. sorrow. pain. anger. misery. here in America, we have the option of insulation from all that. our synthetic alternative is angst. ah... angst. but that's another subject.

Christ gave His flesh "for the life of the world..." do i know what that means? what a travesty, if my life on earth is so cushy that heaven is limited in its appeal...

so... solution... NOT to "feel" guilty, but to BE deeper emotionally... someday, definitely. what to do today?

work on my art paper? it's really the only option available at the moment. but i will be watching for others.

take-my-breath-away thought-of-the-day:
very very cool.

13 abril 2006

20 (ishkai chunkawan) days

Originally uploaded by Allen Smith.
as bracy says... "!aiyiyi!" (accent on the first "yi") do we have any hint of lessons plans yet? eh... noooo... do we need to finish our 6 ethnically-obsessed "works" for multiethnic (MEth) lit? yessss...

!ole! (accent on the "e")

04 abril 2006

Joy proves the point.

thought one:
Last weekend, I enjoyed a beautiful visit at the Jones Compound. Absolutely lovely. The entities there did me the grand pleasure of discussing a previous entry from none other than this very blog! I blushed. I also forgot the exact details of what I had written. But the illustrious Joy reminded me it had to do with cowboys. She was actually a little disgruntled because she felt I had done this breed an injustice by listing them with punk rockers. I meant no harm. I've meant some very nice punk rockers in my life. That's not the point. The point is that she said there ARE good cowboys.

Which means she does not fall in the catagory of "wishing" there were good cowboys. She is convinced they exist because she knows some. This is quite different from being persuaded there are no good men period so she might as well settle for a "good enough" cowboy.

Joy is a well-adjusted, healthy chica whom I admire very much precisely because she is not all fashionably affected with cynicism and self-damaging contentment. I also revere her parents for raising such a sane girl and exposing her to "good" cowboys. Now all the Jones clan has to do is make sure all those good cowboys stay AWAY until the BEST proves himself. I think they're up to it. Remind me to gush over them again sometime.

thought two:
I don't watch movies typically. Back in the day, a weekend didn't get any better than heading to a show on Friday night and filling my mind with absolute drivel that would not leave me for a very long time (not that I cared then.) Then I found out that the Kingdom is so much more intriguing than any of that stuff, and it honestly lost its appeal.

Since then, I've had literature assignments and this and that here and there that have made me need to think of a real-life definition of attention-worthy subjects. [wordiness!] I have put it off, being inherently lazy. But here it goes:

re: movies, literature, music, et cetera

~Would I watch/read/hear/laugh at this with Jesus beside me? [Cause He oh-so-is] Would He find it as amusing as I do?

(oh dear, not "WWJD" again!!!)

~Do this seriously impair my ability to interact with eternity? Is it too big of a jump to switch to Kingdom-of-God-seeking after imbibing this? Does it make reality less real, less relevant? Does it make the reality of Jesus Christ less relevant?

~Could I straight up preach the Gospel to the person sitting beside me? Could I turn to a little one in the faith and tell credibly how God's been working in my life lately?

~Would I turn it off if/ die of embarassment were my mother to walk in and check it out?

~Is it worthwhile for this to be stuck in my head 30 years from now?

For me, it's INCREDIBLY difficult to disengage my mind from a subject once I've "clicked in," especially if something's funny. Literature is really bad for me because I get obsessed with stories and feel like I *have to* finish out the plot. Music I've pretty much built up an immunity to, but sometimes I do listen for curiosity sake ("what ARE kids these days listening to?!"); I'm usually pretty unimpressed pretty quickly.

All in all, one's got to decide beforehand: I will not shame my Savior, no matter how engaging or witty it is or how curious I am.

thought three:
"We clutch so tenaciously to our rights, hopes, ambitions, something to which God has perhaps said a plain no. If would-be comforters offer us consolation and sympathy, if they assist us to strengthen our grasp when it should be loosened, they do not love us as God loves us." ...

'Archbishop Fenelon wrote to the countess ofMontberon, "You want to die, but to die without any pain.... You must give all or nothing when God asks it. If you have not the courage to give at least let Him take.""
~E. Eliot

~Hebrews 12:7

03 abril 2006

:::one month:::